I’m not the kind of person who’s prone to inappropriate effusiveness or quick superlatives, but I’m not sure what other way to approach the Bottega Veneta Uniform Cocco Lave Briefcase. Superlatives were made for this bag.

I’m not sure exactly what I could say that isn’t already clear from looking at the picture; you won’t see crocodile skin so pristine anywhere else this side of Hermes. This is the sort of bag that I would want to keep in my closet and take out every morning to lovingly admire it before work, just to remind myself of what a splendid life I lead. Bottega Veneta has priced it roughly the same as a new Volkswagon, so life would have to be splendid indeed to own one. Buy through Bottega Veneta for $25,700.

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