While the staff at Loewe has been working tirelessly to perfect its grocery bag handbags, designers at Valentino have been plying their trade at the opposite end of the spectrum. The Valentino aesthetic has always been feminine, detailed and utterly glamourous, and the brand has chosen to take those ideas to their absurd extreme with the Valentino Glam Zebra Tote. You have to give them points for just calling this bag what it is, even if the name gives me the mental image of a zebra dressed up as a drag queen (which is not an altogether unpleasant image, admittedly).

This bag is what the Fug Girls would refer to as a “scrolldown fug.” I’m loving how silly and shiny this bag is until we get all the way down to the bottom quarter, at which point things go seriously awry and the bag seems to grow some very shiny porcupine quills. One the one hand: they’re shiny! They fit the motif, whatever it might be! On the other: WTF.

I’m not sure why Valentino thought that silver-and-black sequined leopard print would become monotonous before everyone’s eyes got to the bottom of the bag and it needed something to break it up, but for better or worse, that was the decision that was made. If the bag had been entirely covered in sequined zebra, I would be totally on board for this shining example of in-your-face fashion fun. As it is, I’m only three-quarters of the way there. Buy through Net-a-Porter for $3495.

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Share Your Thoughts With Us

  • 19yearslater

    The bottom looks terrible, like the bag was ruined there and the sequins are starting to fall off.

  • Alma

    I dunno if I like it, it looks messy. But that could have something to so w/ my taste.

  • Sara

    I think the way you go on about It bags, shows how much of a victim you are. The point of High-Fashion is to be unique to stand out from the crowd, yet your always buying what the pack is after.

    • If I bought every bag I wrote about, I’d be so incredibly poor. The only thing I buy is Balenciaga.

      It’s my job (literally) to figure out what the pack is after and put it up for discussion. This isn’t my personal style blog by any stretch of the imagination, and it would be incredibly selfish for me to try to use it as such.

    • Brandon


      My mother always told me ” If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. ” It has really worked well for me, maybe you should use this piece of advice for the better ?

      – Brandon

  • merve

    I totally agree the bag starts off wonderful and then the bottom sequin bit is like “oops we ran out of the sequins to do the zebra..lets just stick some normal ones on” Amanda if you are as much a fashion victim as some of the commenters claim and own all of these bags (inc croc birkins etc) …can i come raid yr wardrobe??? :) :) I dont remember when blogging about bags and buying them became one and the same thing :)

  • Michael St. James

    I LOVE this bag, but the price is OUTRAGEOUS! If I were a woman, I think all of my handbags would be Chloe and all of my clutches would be Valentino.


  • babe

    though I can understand there is some happiness in BLING I would never buy such a bag at this price level. Sara, come on, you can´t be serious about taking a style blog as a personal affair!

  • labellover81

    Love 74% of the bag… who ruined the bottom??

  • Tracey G

    wow..talk about bling (ipad)

  • Tracey G

    bling bling bling (ipad)

  • Tracey G

    bling bling (ipad)

  • Tracey G

    love the silver color (ipad)

  • Tracey G

    wow silver! (ipad)

  • Tracey G

    talk about shiny! (ipad)

  • Tracey G

    not my taste (ipad)

  • Tracey G

    wow wow silver (ipad)

  • Tracey G

    holy shiny! (ipad)

  • Tracey G

    wow silllveeerrr (ipad)

  • Ellen

    Hideous. The bottom is the worst, but I really don’t care for any of it. (ipad)

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