Never have I ever been so worried about the return of one of my favorite shows. The last season of Project Runway was such an abomination against God and Television that I wondered whether I would have to officially give it up if this season followed suit.
Thursday night saw the end to our long national nightmare, also known as Project Runway Season 6. Three brave but dubiously qualified women took the catwalk of battle and squared off with their marginal design talents and delusions of grandeur, and only one would be left standing among the tattered ruins of swatches and…felt helmets?
That’s what those were, right? Whatever, it’s probably best to not ask so many questions, as the answers have been unsatisfying for the entirety of the season (although I’ve got another one – how was it that the designers were shown introducing their collections on the runway when all the press from the event said that they made no appearances and that the designers were not identified? Was that staged?) At this point, I would recommend some serious suspension of disbelief while Carol Hannah, Althea, and Irina all send their models clippity-clopping down the runway and pretend like they’ve made professional-quality collections. (more…)
Once again, for the second time in as many recaps, I got a healthy dose of perspective from my weekend house guest while watching the penultimate episode of this season of Project Runway. After about twenty minutes, he looked at me and asked, “Is this as entertaining as it should be?”
My answer? No, no it’s not. Nor has it been all season. And yet it’s still going on like anyone, anyone at all, actually cares about it. Not only that, but it’s not even done after this episode. Project Runway‘s long, painful death march shall continue for another week. I feel like they should just cut out the audio and play Wagner funeral dirges for the entirety of the finale.
I’m not really sure what I’m going to recap because more or less nothing happened, yet onward we march. Someone strike up the band. (more…)
If you want to continue to watch the rest of this dismal season that is Project Runway, I have but one suggestion for you: don’t watch any of the previous seasons when they play them in marathons on Bravo. You’ll thank me for that tip later.
I made that mistake last week while I was sick, and all it did was remind me of how great this show used to be and how soul-suckingly awful most of this season has been. And it wasn’t even the Christian/Rami/Jillian/Chris March season that I watched; if it had been, I might not have even been able to force myself to continue to recap the lifeless zombie corpse of Project Runway that we have now come to know.
But we trundle on, as we have for the preceding 11 or so weeks, and we’re soon to be awarded for our diligence – this thing is almost over! Thursday night marked the last challenge of the season before our final three go to Fashion Week, which means that we’re two eliminated designers closer to seeing a new season that hopefully won’t be as badly planned or cast as this one was. But for now, we’ve got to get to the messy business of dispatching two more lost designer souls. (more…)
Despite the fact that none of our designers can ever hope to be as spectacularly talented as Christian Siriano was two season ago (or as any of the top four were that season, really), they still continue to plug away at this thing we call Project Runway, even though it’s on a network that no one watches and it directly competes with Real Housewives. Not a good time slot decision, Lifetime execs.
Anyway, I digress. We have, what, like six or seven designers left? I’ve lost count. There are a bunch of chicks and only two dudes left, and the dudes are kind of fail-tastic. Christopher started strong and faltered, while Logan simply managed to sneak in to the next episode every week by not blowing his entire fail load on any one outfit thus far. That doesn’t mean he’s any good, it just means that he’s been slightly less offensive than someone else, time after time.
So did his card get pulled this week, or did another member of his mediocre brethren face Heidi’s tall, Germanic ax? Make the jump to find out. (more…)
So, here we are again. It’s a familiar place. This week on Project Runway, we had another challenge in which our designers were asked to take some money and buy some fabric and make an outfit. Yawn. Where are the corn husks and car parts and recycled water bottles of seasons past? All of these people should be able to make perfectly serviceable outfits out of $150 worth of fabric.
Or you would think so, at least. But because this season is full of fail, that’s not the case. What the designers were asked to do – make an outfit based on a popular vacation destination – was reasonable and also ridiculously easy, but still, some people failed. At least this week, it was the usual suspects. The thinning of the heard continues, as does Irina’s insistence on making me want to punch her in the throat. (more…)
As a person with a Questionable Taste Level, I nearly peed myself when I realized that our designers were charged with creating a Bob Mackie-style getup for Christina Aguilera this week. This week’s episode of Project Runway was called Sequins, Feathers and Fur, Oh My!” and, well, YES. EXACTLY.
I was kind of disappointed that there were no other twists to the challenge and that they were simply given $300 to buy enough sequins to kill a pony and told to make something as shiny as possible, but I have such a deep and abiding love for the kinds of ridiculousness that they were charged with making that, ya know, I’m kind of okay with it.
But fantastical tackiness is not the only thing we got this week: we were also given a long-awaited win, a surprise elimination and the anointing of a new lead villain. Move over, Nicolas. (more…)
Huzzah! This week, we got a challenge that was actually challenging. I thought those had gone the way of the dodo bird!
While it was different than what we’ve seen this season, our designers’ task still fell squarely in one of the half dozen or so challenge categories that we’ve seen in the history of the show. They were given the job of taking a divorcee’s wedding dress and turning it into a kicky new outfit for them to start their new lives (except that some of them have been divorced since I was in elementary school…but through the magic of television, they’re just started new lives now).
I’ve always liked the “old to new” challenges because they’re doubly difficult: not only do they severely limit the amounts and types of materials that the designers are allowed to work with, but they also mean that the designers have to tailor something to fit an actual woman instead of a six-foot model, which has created some classic meltdowns over the years.
So now, on to the recap. But before we get there, can someone call the cops and report Nina Garcia as a missing person? I’m concerned. And also, it severely limits my ability to make “don’t bore Nina” jokes, and that’s not fair. (more…)
PurseBloggers, I’m at my wit’s end with this show.
Why? Because Potato Face Nicolas won a challenge last week on Project Runway and that means that he had immunity this week, which means that even though he’s full of fail, he didn’t get eliminated. And we had a perfect chance to banish him from our TV screens forever this week, and the stupid immunity thing got in the way.
And furthermore, because the challenge sucked. There is no way to describe it except that. After two weeks of strong, interesting things for the designers to do, all they wanted from them during this challenge was cheap blue crap. Literally. They were supposed to design two all-blue outfits for the Macy’s INC brand, which is a line full of quasi-trendy pieces made for people that really like jersey and polyester (not gonna lie, I have a few of their pieces myself, but that doesn’t mean it’s something I want to spend an hour of my life watching on tv).
I find myself confused to even be writing this, because this show doesn’t matter until Nicolas is gone and we get can actually stop looking at his lumpy head and start watching the real designers go at it, but whatever. Meh. This whole season is MEH. THIS IS PROJECT MEH. (more…)
What has Lifetime done with Nina Garcia and Michael Kors, and who are these people that are sitting in their chairs?!?! Do we as viewers need to come up with a ransom to get them back? Do we need to pass around the collection plate?
Anyway. You know how, in every other episode of Project Runway for the past five seasons, someone gets dinged for being “too costume-y?” Well, they’ve now completely given up and decided to let the designers just make actual costumes. For movies, because they film in Los Angeles now, remember? REMEMBER? Because they can’t stop talking about it, and I wish they would.
Despite my irritation, this wasn’t a bad challenge. It was particularly interesting because genres were assigned instead of everyone just getting to pick, which meant that not everyone could do “Old Hollywood Glamour” (and, interestingly, several of the people that got the chance to do it totally crapped the bed, so to speak). But it wasn’t one of those people that got sent home – no, no, it was someone that actually had a bit of potential. (more…)
Finally. FINALLY. An episode with some personality, some drama, some dresses made out of weird materials. I thought it might never happen.
On Thursday night, our gaggle of hapless Project Runway designers were charged with making something – anything – out of newspaper. The Los Angeles Times, to be exact! Which should tell you something pointed about the state of print media right there – not only are they giving it away, but they’re not even expecting anyone to read it! No, no, it’s simply as a fabric substitute. No reading required. So I guess print publications beat out online media in that respect; you can’t make a dress out of a blog, can you?
Go ahead, try. I’ll wait.
Can’t do it, can you? And some of our designers, regrettably, couldn’t even do it when given pallets of newsprint. But, lo and behold, a couple of them actually came through for us. And one of them royally screwed up, lied, and made Tim Gunn very unhappy, which is almost as bad as if you bore Nina. (more…)
Alright, I’m bored.
I’m sick of designers making cocktail dresses out of actual fabric with a reasonable budget and amount of time within which to accomplish things. I want coffee filters and corn husks and candy wrappers. I want to watch a dozen designers make something out of nothing with very little time in which to do it, because when you expect fashion miracles from people, sometimes you get astoundingly great stuff. Remember Blue Cup Dress, or what about Pleated Twizzler Wrapper Dress? A great designers can make a great dress out of anything. A mediocre Project Runway contestant can make something passable out of fabric, if given enough time. Those challenges are what separate the men from the boys on Project Runway.
And apparently, we shall have none of that on Lifetime. What was this week’s challenge? Party dresses! For models! And I guess it was at least partly interesting, because it sharply underlined which designers really aren’t familiar with the fashion industry, with models, with what models actually wear in their down time, or with what looks good on a model. And I guess that all of those things are kind of important if you want to be a designer. (more…)