So, the 1980s throwback trend is, like, a thing. I get that. I’m even a moderate supporter of it, when done correctly. The 80s were a time of excess and fashion-forwardness and questionable taste, and everyone loves that, right? Right. Except when it’s done like the Pauric Sweeney Padded Patchwork Top Handle, I don’t love it. At all. Not even a little. It kind of makes my eyes hurt to look at it. This isn’t just a winking reference to 80s ridiculousness – this is taking something that was already fug back then and making it more fug and more expensive 25 years later. And I, for one, am not fooled and not impressed. In order to do “retro” correctly, a designer has to somehow make it sleeker and more modern than it was to begin with, and there’s nothing about this bag that looks updated in the least. It wasn’t cute then, and it’s not cute now, sadly; it’s a retro-gone-wrong monstrosity. Even if this bag was given to me for free, I sincerely doubt I would wear it to anything but a costume party. Buy through LuisaViaRoma for â‚¬ 810.00.