Back when I wrote about the fantastical, confusing, reptilian shoes that Alexander McQueen showed for his brilliant Spring 2010 runway show, I remember thinking that the only person that I could see actually trying to wear the shoes in any serious way was Lady Gaga. Apparently I can predict the future, so if any of you would like to know if you should dump your current boyfriend, you know who to ask.

Unless you weren’t already convinced of Alexander McQueen‘s dark genius by the pictures of the clothing from his show, we submit to you: the shoes.

What we got from this collection (among other things) is perhaps the most ostentatious, progressive approach to footwear that we’ve ever seen from a major designer, at least in recent memory. The shoes were, on average, a full ten inches tall with huge platforms in the front to make them at least somewhat functional for walking.

Alexander McQueen. He wins. He wins at innovation, he wins at Paris Fashion Week, he wins at life. His collection was so mesmerizing, so totally awe-inspiring, that I don’t even need to see the rest of the shows to declare him the victor.

McQueen titled his show “Plato’s Atlantis,” and the aquatic, amphibious influence was clear from look one. Other designers this season have shown us visions of the world, post-apocalypse, but this collection may be the most fully realized of any of them.

In the immortal words of Carrie Bradshaw: “Hello, lover.”

It is no secret that we are huge fans of Alexander McQueen at PurseBlog. His over the top fashion shows have editors, bloggers, and anyone who caught a glimpse of the show talking for months. Alexander McQueen himself is a private man, but we would give anything to be in his head (follow him on Twitter for the best chance to do so).

I think I’m in love.

We’re talking more than we normally do about Alexander McQueen, and that’s not just because he’s one of my favorite designers. Well, that’s part of the reason, since I’m the one picking the bags, but it’s not the entire thing!

Mostly it’s because, more than anyone else, McQueen’s luxe-punk aesthetic embodies so many of the trends for fall that other designers are scrambling to ape.

There are a lot of things that I love. I love Alexander McQueen. I love black and white patterns. I love challenging design. I love it when function and art collide and something interesting results.

But I don’t love the Alexander McQueen Houndstooth Tote.

I love tiny, sophisticated bags that make a statement. Kind of like Alice Cullen, who is petite and graceful but packs a mean punch (that’s for you, fellow Twilight fans). That is why I was so excited when I saw the Alexander McQueen Clover Medium Satchel. Key word: medium, but my eyes glossed over that and I only saw the stock photograph, imagining how gorgeous the little bag must look in person.

Everyone has that girlfriend in their group that is, after approximately a glass and a half of white wine, completely hammered, carrying her high heels in her hand, and asking everyone if they’ve seen her handbag. And no one has seen it, because she left it sitting on the back of the toilet at the last bar you were in, and its contents have already been pillaged.