Vaginal Yoga. Water Birth. Night Terrors. Bereavement. These are all hard-hitting issues we dealt with (or pretended to deal with) in this week’s episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. I’m not gonna lie, this episode of KUTK blew me away with its sheer emotional magnitude. Its deep exploration of the human condition. It almost makes up for the fact that most episodes leave me feeling like I’ve decreased my IQ by 12 points per viewing.

So where were we with Keeping Up With The Kardashians? Right – Kris Jenner was exacting revenge on Bruce for having golf dates with a former supermodel by getting some “closure” with her long-ago ex, “Todd.” I put his name in quotes because I remain unconvinced that he’s not just a talking blow-up doll. We reconvened with Todd and Kris as they decided what to do about all that oozing sexual tension.

This week, Sunday night with Keeping Up With the Kardashians was particularly trying. I first had to watch this horrible, horrible episode of KUWTK, and then I had to expend even more precious brain energy analyzing it. As if these people and their actions aren’t totally transparent. Kris Jenner’s emotional infancy has me seriously fuming this week. I apologize in advance for the liberal use of all caps, but seriously.

Sometimes I think that Real Housewives seasons exist solely so that we’ll have something to talk about at the reunions. Watching last night’s finale of the Real Housewives of Orange County reunion, I definitely got that feeling; the entire season seemed like a run-up to what may have been the juiciest reunion episode ever, and despite the fact that it took 20 episodes to get there, it seemed worth it.

So last night on Keeping Up With The Kardashians, Kim, Scott, Rob, and Johnathan (remember him?) were in London. And Bruce, Kris, and Khloe were in Boston. Hopefully, you were somewhere else other than on the couch drinking white wine and watching E! from 9-10 pm EST last night, and that’s why you’re here. Wise choice.

Last night’s Real Housewives of Orange County Reunion Part 1 went pretty much how you’d expect. The OC ladies are more than willing to catfight with each other in whatever setting they might be thrown in to, so there was plenty of drama and entertainment. People called each other fake, shifted alliances were called into question, Alexis continued to mispronounce things, Tamra’s hair was enormous.

This episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians opened with the infamous “flour bombing” incident from last April. While it seemed fairly dramatic (and Kim seemed fairly mad) at the time, here we just saw Kim cracking jokes and brushing it off (both literally and figuratively) and stepping back out on to the red carpet. The incident is just a little blip in this episode, but if it hadn’t been around the same time Kim and Kanye started to get publicly cozy, it probably would’ve been a much bigger plot point.

Reality television is a fickle beast – some weeks, I’m ready to rip my eyes out from sheer boredom as the Kardashians repeatedly trip over themselves trying to create a decent plotline. But other weeks, 3 particularly juicy ones fall right out of the sky. In this week’s episode, Lamar Odom got released from the Dallas Mavericks, which meant the not-so-triumphant return of Khloe and Lamar to L.A., and the set of “Kardashians.”

On this week’s episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians, the vacation from hell continued. Indeed, it became even more hellish. Khloe snuck off in the beginning of the episode, thankful she got to go crawl back into the safe arms of her “peaceful” gentle giant, Lamar Odom, claiming she needed “a vacation from this vacation.” I think we’ve all had those family vacations, so this expression seems particularly apt.

Just like an argument can be made that the real story of Mad Men is about the women who inhabit Don Draper’s universe, I’d be willing to consider that perhaps the real story of Real Housewives of Orange County is about the men who buzz around our cast members like so many horse flies. Other than Drunk Sarah getting kicked out of the party, last night’s episode was almost entirely about the husbands and boyfriends.

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