For the more conservative among us, Fendi also makes lovely sueded snakeskin

When we wrote about Fendi’s colorblocked clutch and what it portends for spring’s trends last week, your reaction was predictably split. A strong point of view will always divide people, even if all the people responding have great taste (and, duh, of course you do). For those of you who thought that Fendi veered into stank territory with that clutch, we present you with the Fendi Forever Mamma Anaconda Shoulder Bag.

I like this design for a couple of reasons. First, charcoal is my favorite neutral. The people at Bergdorfs apparently think this bag is black, but I reject their reality and substitute my own. Second, it’s made out of anaconda skin instead of the standard python, which simultaneously reminds me of “Baby Got Back” and that horrible Jennifer Lopez movie about anacondas that came out while I was in middle school. And, I mean, who doesn’t have positive associations with the days when your parents used to have to drop you off and pick you up so you could see a movie with eight of your closest twelve-year-old friends?

All J.Lo hackery aside, this design has a lot going for it. The “Mamma” shape that Fendi has been pushing for a while is functional and useful, and redoing it in a lush exotic only makes it better. My favorite part, though, is the hardware. It would have been completely reasonable for Fendi to do a gold-on-black-enamel logo clasp and leave it at that, but the tortoise shell background (and links in the handle hardware) adds a special and unexpected detail to the design that made me look twice when I probably would have scrolled past it otherwise. Oh, who am I kidding – the sueded snakeskin would have stopped me in my tracks by itself. Buy through Bergdorf Goodman for $2710.