To believers, astrology is a science rooted in millennia of history and culture. To me, astrology is something I seek out when I remember it exists in order to see if something fantastic is about to happen to me. I immediately forget my horoscope moments after reading it, even when it strongly cautions me to be careful about making major decisions during the mercury retrograde.
Is there something to astrology? I wanted to find out. I exhaustively researched the rich history of astrology in order to answer the question we may ask ourselves at some point: what’s my dream purse based on my astrological sign?
If you like your sign’s purse, that’s the power of astrology in action. If you don’t like your sign’s purse, then blame your rising fashion sign or something. Astrology is only real if you like the answers it gives you.
Aries
If you’re an Aries, your trailblazing and impulsive nature may lead to some unique bag choices. You are not one to follow trends: you only wear things you love. For the fast-paced adventurer side of Aries, your dream purse is a sporty and classic Le Pliage in an unexpected print.
Taurus
A Taurus values comfort and functionality, but your laid back style has plenty of room for bold statements. A padded Prada nylon clutch in neon pink will appeal to all your senses – you’ll look cool, and it will feel as if you’re holding a pillow.
Gemini
As the cliche goes, a Gemini will dress conservatively one day and morph into a punk rocker the next. Your purse collection is likely quite random, but there’s definitely room for a versatile bag you can pair with a variety of different styles. A Dionysus can add edge to a demure outfit or take an edgy look to the next level.
Cancer
If you’re a Cancer, your look is probably somewhat sophisticated. You may give the PVC bag trend a miss, which is honestly a good decision that I won’t make, but you’re not opposed to adding some drama into your look. Try this delightful Tess bag, which will add a touch of class and elegance to everything you wear.
Leo
Leo’s love to be the center of attention, and they also have a thing about hair, so if you’re a Leo, a furry Chanel flap bag should do the trick.
Virgo
Virgos are practical perfectionists who shy away from splurging in favor of saving up for large investments. This can only mean one thing: every Virgo needs a Birkin bag. While the price is high, Virgos are willing to pay for quality and utility. You’ll buy it second hand, of course, but try to at least choose a fun color! (Full disclosure: I am a Virgo and, yes, I chose the best bag for myself.)
Libra
Libras are all about balance and tend to gravitate to classic looks. A Givenchy Horizon bag will keep your look fresh as you flit from one social engagement to the next.
Scorpio
Scorpios are famous for their dark side, and whether or not that reputation is well-earned, they should all immediately purchase this studded fanny pack.
Sagittarius
Sagittarians are known for their sense of humor and love of adventures. This Louis Vuitton Wave is playful and funky – perfect for taking with you as you explore the world.
Capricorn
Capricorns are represented by something called a sea goat, which has the body of a goat and a fish’s tail? Not relevant, but disturbing nonetheless. Capricorns gravitate to the classics, and are known for being responsible and measured. Your dream bag is this Lady Dior, which will easily transition from the office to….more work.
Aquarius
Aquarius is the quirky rebel of the zodiac, and that includes fashion choices. Carry these rainbow french fries while you’re leading the revolution.
Pisces
Pisces are symbolized by a gentle and artistic mythical creature named Jon Bon Jovi. Just kidding, though he is a Pisces and I have known that since becoming obsessed with him 25 years ago. Pisces are creative and dreamy, often tending toward the bohemian. Try an elaborately beaded Alaia Mina tote to carry around your flute and paintbrushes.
Although i’m a Cancer/July Baby, I prefer the Longchamp ( My next Purchase! It’s SOOOO cute and something I would look forward to using every Winter season to make me smile through the cold) and the Alaia mina because it reminds me of a sunburst and I LOVE anything summery : )
I’m a Virgo and you nailed it! HAHA!
GAH I love this concept. This is the only kind of horoscope I want to read, haha
Dumb post.
Hey, it’s just a bit of fluffy fun. We do need fluffy fun in our lives, because the world ? is a pretty dark place, right now, without it. ?
or… it’s garbage fed to PB readers.
Oh, calm down.
Sorry your majesty. I meant to say that this article is Pulitzer Prize material.
Really hoping we win a Pulitzer Prize this year, we’ve been so close in the past….!
I would love that for you Megs. But you’re gonna need to make sure that your contributors use spellcheck! 🙂
Well, 10/10 for me – Aries and Le Pliage! One of my favorite designs, although I still don’t own a printed version. Too many to choose from…
Me too, I wanted the kitten one that they had a few years ago, but none of the newer ones have caught my attention.
I like the Cage aux Oiseaux and the Autour de Ha Long. I’m really bad at making moves on special edition bags!
Well I’m a Taurus and wouldn’t be caught dead with that bright pink Prada mini bag.
Same here! ? but at least we didn’t get the French fries bag ?
?
I’m an Aquarius and I loved the french fries bag!
lol – I’m an Aquarius and I hated the french fry bag but I thought the article was cute because I don’t take signs seriously.
As a Taurus I choose to break free from preordained zodiac orbit and destiny! I will carry that Birkin in croc even if it breaks my shoulder!
Mine was spot on including my feelings toward being a sea goat. But I do tend to favor the classics nothing too trendy. This was cute.
I’m a Gemini, and that description is so very accurate. I own everything from Chanel to Dooney. Right now, I’m into everything minimal and classic. Yet, I’m wearing a tricked out leather jacket and, what my co-workers call, my bedazzled boots. I’m all over the place!
Me too! I love the classics, but always feel the need to add something edgy or quirky to mix things up. As Gemini’s, we’re pretty open minded to trying new things, & having a variety of “looks”. You know, classy with a kick! I love that Gucci bag she picked! (Psst! I have a pair of sea blue-green velvet bootie’s that are bedazzling, too!? They have pearl beads sprinkled here & there, on them?? – utterly impractical!)
This is a cute post! 🙂
What a fun post! As a Leo I’d agree with a Chanel but not in fur, you can’t see the CC!! We like to be flashy and want people to know exactly what we’ve got! Probs a gold leather bag (we are royalty after all)!
Relax sis it’s not that serious
Slowdiving- I LOVE YOU and I am HERE FOR THIS!!!!!
Lol sis, again, it’s not that serious
I love you. Sometimes readers need to take their meds before posting publicly.
I am a Pisces and when I got to the last bag for us Pisces girls, the last sign of the Zodiac, it was a dead hit! Totally the bag I would pick out of all of them! Gorgeous and matches my personality. Enjoyed this article, thanks.
So funny
That last one is SUCH a Pisces bag
Cute post Kristen! My favorite line is the disclaimer that states its only real if you like the answers…lol!! Have a great weekend 😉
Do not ever read horscope but this time i like it as a Virgo. Hermès is on my wishlist in a fun color.
Was I the only one that laughed out loud at “furry Chanel flap”
I am a Pisces and you are spot on !!!
Oh my! haha how true! I am a Virgo and I only really do go for Birkins and Hermes.
My horoscope is Aquarius and I would never wear a French fry bag. Also, it’s $5,695! I’ll take the Birkin, please!
Aquarius here too and felt the exact same way! Cute article nonetheless.
I read the Dior article that you referenced and it’s really not that much better than this one. Perhaps next time you make a comparison you can provide something with more substance since this was not very impressive. Thx!
I am a Capricorn and a Lady Dior would be the wrongest style for me — I am a tomboy who likes unfussy practical bags
Funny it’s quite true, although I don’t have any LP in my closet at all.