Remember how Phaedra swore up and down that she was only six or seven months pregnant? Well, she was wrong, and Kim’s technical knowledge of neonatal science was correct, and Real Housewives of Atlanta again forced us to reevaluate what we believe about people like lawyers, professional mistresses and basically anyone else who aspires to reality television fame.

The baby was had, and unfortunately, my previous prediction was wrong: he didn’t covered out covered in rhinestones and eyeshadow. But maybe there’s some hope for those kinds of shenanigans from Kim’s future baby with the 25-year-old football player she hit on last week, because the news around the Internet this morning is that they’re having a kid. Life&Style has the preggo belly shot to prove it. But I digress; we have an entire episode to discuss.

First up was Phaedra, because as much as you and I might hate her, she’s totally making this show right now with her hilariously high levels of idiocy. Instead of having her baby in Atlanta like a normal person who lives in a large city, Phaedra decided it would be a great idea to have the baby three hours away in Augusta because there’s a doctor there who she met while dispensing questionable legal advice over the radio. She seems to be under the impression that he’s the best OB-GYN in Georgia, but Phaedra clearly doesn’t do a great job picking things like makeup artists and hairdressers, I’m going to go ahead and take her opinion of the “best” of anything with a grain of salt.

But still, for some reason, her husband let her schlep the entire family down to a city in which they don’t live to have their baby with some radio doctor (and we’ll get to why radio doctors aren’t to be trusted later) who didn’t seem to know anything about Phaedra’s pregnancy when they first met him. Instead of having an exam in a doctor’s office like a normal pregnant lady would with her doctor, Phaedra and Apollo sat out on a porch somewhere with the doctor and his wife, drinking sweet tea, lounging in whicker chairs and more or less trying to simultaneously perform every Southern stereotype that they could think of.

Phaedra told her doctor that she didn’t know when the baby was due (an odd thing for a woman two days from actually having a kid) with a completely straight face, and she followed it up with an anecdote about how her husband had been over eight pounds when his mom had him three months early. Apollo just kind of shrugged and mumbled, since Phaedra had clearly beaten him into compliance before the conversation took place.

Instead of telling Phaedra to stop lying, the doctor and his wife just nodded, amazed. Personally, if an OB/GYN isn’t willing to call someone out on that kind of nonsense, I’m not sure that he should be delivering any babies. Even most of our Real Housewives of Atlanta cast members were smart enough to figure out that Phaedra was lying and express some sort of disbelief that she would even try to concoct such a story. This doctor? Not a peep. Perhaps Phaedra had taken the back of her hand to him before the conversation as well.

Back in Atlanta, Kandi had a little get-together at her boutique to celebrate her 34th birthday, and all of the relatively sane cast members showed up to celebrate. And when I say “relatively sane,” I mean relative to Phaedra, and perhaps she should reevaluate her life choices up to this point if her presences make people like Nene and Kim look reasonable and logical. As always, Kim stole the show at Kandi’s party by being shameless and entirely lacking self-awareness; not only did she show up with a giant box containing a custom wig made for Kandi (on a side note, it appeared to be a version of my favorite Kim wig with red lowlights), but she also got a little drunk and dispensed lots of nursing school knowledge about why Phaedra is a lying sack of crap. At this point, Kandi was the only person who still wanted to believe Phaedra’s pregnancy timeline, but she would be set right soon.

Before that could happen, though, we had to accompany Nene to a meeting with Karen Greer, who is an actual news anchor in Atlanta who does real things which don’t usually involve reality TV personalities. How she got roped into this mess, I’ll never know. At any rate, Nene wanted to be a local entertainment reporter, and the network clearly saw plenty of opportunities for Nene to use her position in the “entertainment” industry (I’m sorry, I’m just not ready to admit that Nene Leakes is an actual celebrity) to interview locally dwelling celebs like Tyler Perry and Ludacris. Everyone’s eyes lit up with dollar signs, a deal was made, and our girl Nene had her first job since her days as a pole professional. This gig, thankfully, requires more clothes.

Still in Augusta, Phaedra was prepared to have her baby with not only a full face of makeup (we all knew that would happen, and if you didn’t, you haven’t been paying attention) but Chanel earrings and what appeared to be fake eyelashes. I’m not sure how you get up in the morning on the day your first child is going to be born and take the time to glue on your lashes, but Phaedra’s priorities clearly differ from those of people who live in objective reality. At least she wasn’t wearing that awful blue and pink eyeshadow in her hospital bed – she went with sunrise tones of gold and yellow instead, applied with a trowel as always. Tasteful.

After arriving to the hospital and being induced, we found out why Phaedra’s been lying about her due date for weeks – her mom doesn’t “allow” out-of-wedlock babies. I was under the impression that Phaedra was an adult woman with a job and a husband and the ability to make her own reproductive decisions, but apparently I was wrong. Kandi was there to hear the news from mom, as well as to watch the doctor walk in minutes later and announce to the entire room, including Pastor Mommy, that Phaedra had carried the baby to full term – 40 weeks. So much for that baby being fully cooked in six or seven months, eh Phaedra?

The baby had to be delivered by c-section in the next scene, which was absolutely icky to watch for both us AND Phaedra, whose first reaction upon seeing her new baby was a disgusted “eww.” Also, she thought the baby looked Chinese (she said Chinese, not Asian, just to be clear), despite the fact that there were clearly no other brand new babies in the room that could have caused such a mixup. That this woman has a law degree from my alma mater is something for which I will always feel shame.

Over at Sheree’s house, the subject had also turned to questionably qualified radio doctors and shady educational backgrounds. Sheree had decided to hold a Spades (which, by the way, is great fun) game at her house and invite all of the non-birthing housewives and The Love Doctor, whose real name I can’t spell, not that it matters. Lawrence, Kandi’s mom and Lisa also showed up, everyone got to drinking, and then Nene realized that she knew Sheree’s maybe-boyfriend from somewhere.

As it turns out, he used to dispense love advice on the radio in Atlanta until there was some sort of scandal about whether or not he was actually a doctor. He also used to make appearances on the Ricki Lake show, and really, that’s all I need to hear to know that he must be a consumate professional. Ricki was part of my afternoon routine when I was a kid, and I refuse to believe that she would allow some charlatan masquerading as a doctor to give advice on her esteemed program.

Except, wait, do you guys remember the Ricki Lake show? It was epically trashtastic, and I honestly wish it were still around to perk up my afternoons. And really, it’s fitting that someone who was a regular feature on Ricki would show up on something like Real Housewives of Atlanta, because both of those programs have similar places in their respective pop culture eras. It’s only logical that people who were on bad talk shows in the 90s are now on gloriously bad reality shows.

Once Nene figured out why she recognized The Love Doctor, the hunt was on. When you’ve got five drunk women, their best gay and one of their mothers grilling you about your educational background and whether or not you’re actually a doctor, it becomes difficult to keep a story straight and stick to your lies. He eventually started sweating and admitted that his doctorate was from an online diploma mill and he wasn’t licensed to practice in Georgia, which meant that he couldn’t legally call himself a doctor, and Sheree was shocked. You would think that she would have realized by now that something was up with him, but I guess Sheree isn’t exactly sharp as a tack.

Speaking of people who are too trusting, Kandi took the opportunity to announce to the group that Kim (and everyone else) had been right and she knew for a fact that Phaedra had been at full term when she delivered her baby. Everyone cackled and smirked and felt smug and self-satisfied about catching that moron in a lie, and you have to admit, that’s one of the greatest feelings ever if you’re jaded and generally convinced of your own cleverness (and let’s face it, most of us are, including me). There’s something exhilaratingly self-affirming about being right in those situations, even if the lie was a bad one. And really, how much worse does it get than Phaedra claiming to only need six months to cook a baby?

Actually, I shouldn’t ask that question, because just when these ladies seem to have hit rock bottom, they get industrious and keep digging. Phaedra’s mutant Chinese baby is a new and wonderful low, but we’ve still got plenty of season left in Atlanta.

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  • Chick

    You left out the best quote of the night! When they were sitting on the front porch of that B&B Phaedra said “Oooooh look! Lady Fingers with Barbarian cream!”

    And when they held up her newly-born baby for the first time she said “GROSS!” A real ‘feel good’ moment to play back for the little tyke in a few years.

    • Did she really say Barbarian? I’ll have to go back and check on my DVR, I guess I just assumed it had to be Bavarian. Even though ladyfingers don’t generally have Bavarian cream, as far as I know, and the only things I could see on the platter appeared to be danishes. Not that I think Phaedra could actually identify Bavarian cream from any other kind of dessert filling.

      I should know not to give Phaedra the benefit of the doubt by now.

      • EllenR

        Yep, she said “barbarian.” It was lady fingers and lunacy all night long. I still can’t believe that Sheree never even once Googled that joker. He’s a cornball and a liar…off with his head! And what was with the shade Sheree was throwing at NeNe regarding Peter…out of bounds!

        Another great episode and recap!

      • sandy

        I’m pretty sure she said Barvarian, I thought it was barbarian at first too but after rewinding it, she actually said Barvarian…I’m not sure how much better that is since she’s supposed to be a lawyer, but at least it’s a little closer to bavarian…

      • dbl d

        Sheree’s on point re: NeNe, not out of bounds. Whenever NeNe addresses Peter, her voice is dripping with a heavy lilt that is completely overdone. It occurred during that Dancing with Stars fundraiser–with Greg present no less. In fact NeNe has been flirting with Peter since he called her out during that round table discussion about sex, implying that she had not taken proper care of her man. She appears to be trying to ooze sex appeal to combat Peter’s critique that her failed marriage was based on her lack.

      • Monica B

        I thought I misheard barbarian at first, but I acutally rewound that part a few times and it definitely sounds like barbarian. Hysterical.

    • annie

      Bavarian Cream! That was hilarious!!! Loved it and even waited for that very line on the next rerun!

  • Sakyie

    Seriously, Phaedra is about as smart as wet napkin. I’m so excited for this season’s reunion, just to see the ladies unleash on her over such a huge lie. I’m sure she’ll say she lief to prevent any embarrassment for her mother, but come on!

  • RHOA Addict

    Amanda I have to say this was a tragic episode and your blog has me ROFL. OMG and I agree, I’m a UGA alum too and idk how Phaedra got her law degree there! Now Kimmy (who isn’t fat, but looks like herself according to Andy Cohen) is knocked up by the football player with the nice booty! What did we do b4 RHOA?!?!

  • TammyD

    I can relate to Phaedra with regards to having an overly religious mother (I’m glad this is the ONLY thing we have in common). I’m 30 and my mom is very strict about babies out of wed-lock etc…It’s that fear of letting them down…and now that I think about it, I can see why Phaedra is the way she is. She is trying to live up to mommy’s expectations…but she is failing miserably!

  • Loving This

    Is anyone else suffering the effects of whiplash from the abrupt change in disposition Kim displayed when she so confidently articulated the medical facts of why Phaedra’s baby couldn’t possibly be fully developed? I was really impressed!

    • Sakyie

      So was I! I remember her mentioning back in Season 1 that she’d been a nurse at some point in her life. I just assumed it was a short stint as a CNA or something. LOL

    • I was impressed too! When she mentioned a few episodes ago that her nursing degree was from UCONN, I was kind of surprised – I figured she had just done some sort of short program to be a “nurse.” But she was an actual, honest-to-god hospital-employed nurse who appeared to know exactly what she was talking about. Baffling.

  • Gorgeous in NC

    I Louvre your RHOA recaps! Just to clarify the nursing thing, Kim was a licensed practical nurse from 1999-2003. LPNs don’t get a degree… They receive a certificate from a vocational/ technical school. I don’t believe U Conn has a vo-tech division… TeeHee. I am a n RN with a masters degree in nursing. That being said, I do believe Kim worked in labor and delivery as an LPN. My jaw hit the floor when she started ponticating on surfactant and infant lung development… Because she k ew her ish!!!! Who knew Kimmie had layers??!!

    • Interesting, she said she had a nursing degree from UCONN two weeks ago. I wonder if that’s a, uh, “approximation” of the truth.

  • JenG

    Thank you Amanda! Keep up the good work, I can’t wait to watch RHOA on Sunday’s and then I can’t wait to read your recap.

  • suz

    Ho-hum…..everything was pretty much a bore….no surprises…especially the baby. However, did anyone else think Apollo seemed really sweet and supportive? I found myself wondering why even an ex-con would be with that dumb crazy woman. Maybe he’ll go for custody and run like the wind. Kim’s song was absolutely horrible as premiered on Andy Cohen. She said she wasn’t pregnant. Do we believe her?

    • She’s pregnant, the story in Life&Style is from her. She likely denied it last night so she wouldn’t jeopardize her exclusivity deal (and monetary compensation) from the magazine.

      • suz

        Oh for heaven’s sake…Thanks for that tidbit. I haven’t yet gotten to that in my grocery store check out reading. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised…..

  • Lisa in Oregon

    I too, was amazed at Kim’s apparent knowledge of pregnancy/nursing. She was dropping medical terms as though she just waled out of a maternity ward. It was kind of an out-of-body experience. First time I’ve ever (dare I say it) respected Kim.

    This was a show of firsts for me because I also felt a little bad for Phaedra. (I know!) The scene with her mom was both hilarious and sad. Kind of explains a lot about her, too.

  • erica

    The ricki lake show was the shizzle! A girl I knew in HS was on that show. She came out as gay to her family. Dramatic. But please tell me you remember richard bey? My ex boyfriend was on there with his new girlfriend and she placed him on the wheel of torture (emphasis on ex)

    Can someone get Dr. Nobody a freshly pressed blazer. Those wrinkles are killing me. Ok, I have to admit Lawrence is my new fav gay over grumpo Dwight, “Is him tickled”? Priceless

    When baby learne to walk, RUN, don’t walk, away from Phadera. Run like the wind!!

  • erica

    Oh wait, I almost forgot my other favorite part of last night’s show,it was a snippet in between commercials…”Mom, I’m carrying eggs around?” LMAO.

    • Nee

      haha, that had me rolling on the floor!

  • dani

    the best line of the night was from Kim when she was trying to interrogate Dwight about Phaedra’s baby…
    Kim to Dwight “He must be the father cause he was very upset”

  • Lorie

    I absolutely LIVE for the reunion show now! I want to see Phaedra get the calling out that she so richly deserves. It will be better than a plate of ladyfingers full of Barbarian cream.

    The only thing better than the doctor proclaiming she was full term was that whole public outing of the fake doctor – at a Spades party. Does it really get any better than that? The only thing missing was Kim DENYING that she was pregnant – which happened in the after show.

    I guess girlfriend bounced a few things other than quarters off that man’s backside. Umm, hmm.

    • “I guess girlfriend bounced a few things other than quarters off that man’s backside.” That made me laugh so hard I snorted. +1.

      Also, I can’t hate. I’d hit it.

  • MiMi

    I’m still in denial about Phaedra–not about the pregnancy lie but that she thought anyone would believe it. Each week, I kept yelling at the TV, “But you’re not SERIOUS right?!” I thought the scene with her delivery doctor was hilarious. He told her the baby was full term. She told him that was his “opinion.” He said it wasn’t his opnion, it was a fact. All the while Big Momma is sitting there! I thought the baby was adorable, but from Phaedra’s first reaction to him and previews of next week, there doesn’t seem to be much bonding on her part. I’ve said it before, “Apollo, take that baby boy and RUN!”

    • Lorie

      Oh, that precious little baby is so adorable. I hope she realizes how lucky she is to have him. :-)

  • Sean B

    Does anyone have a good recipe for Barbarian cream? I’m making ladyfingers for Thanksgiving dessert.

    • Mimi

      Beat 3 barbarians to a pulp. Add fingers. Chill.

      • sandy m

        @ Amanda…absolutely luv the weekly recaps…BUT regarding Mimi’s recipe for barbarian cream….by far, the funniest comment of them all…absolutely hilarious!!

      • Sean B

        Thanks for the recipe, Mimi! The ladyfingers with Barbarian cream were a HUGE hit at Thanksgiving!!

  • Fallon

    OMG Phaedra was 40 weeks!! I don’t know how she thought she cold keep that lie up in front on the dr. Too much.
    As for Dr Tye E, he was on I Love New York that came on VH1 a couple yrs ago. New York kicked him off the show because he lied about his doctoral status on the show.
    Love the recaps as always Amanda.

  • Loving This

    I’m pretty sure Kim threw back a few Xanies before Andy’s show last night. She was so boring. It reminded me of Danielle’s last appearance. What’s up with that? I love when he has “real” stars who are fans of RH on the show and they have a total blast with Andy. My faves have been Sarah Jessica Parker and the SNL women.

  • Tay

    Amanda I could not WAIT to read your recap today. It is the best!

    So after Kim drops all of her medical science on the group, she tells Kandi that she “just may ride to Augusta with her,” but then asks if she can smoke cigarette in the car during the three hour road trip. Kandi gives her an emphatic and shifty eyed “NO!” and Kim tells her in that case, she can’t make the trip. Clearly she knows medical science but doesn’t apply it.

    Let me understand this, mom is adamant out “babies born out of wedlock” but has no problem with her daughter marrying an ex-con??? *sigh* I am confused.

    What bothers me most about Non-Dr. Tiyee is that landing strip on the top of his head.

    • Lisa in Oregon

      Phaedra’s husband may be an ex-con, but remember, he’s “clean.” :)

  • dbl d

    Sheree’s commentary about NeNe (ie throwing shade as per EllenR) is very insightful and on point. NeNe has been flirting with Peter for the past two episodes. Most notably after he called her out about not taking proper care of her man during that round table discussion about sex; Peter commented that her relationship woes were a result of her inattention, or something like that.

  • Mama M

    From reading the recaps and the comments, it appears that Kim isn’t being honest about her nursing “degree,” and Dr. Love isn’t really a doctor. Are we sure Phaedra really has a law degree?!!

    NeNe was a pole dancer? That must have been some pole….. Like the ones holding my house up.

  • Irene

    OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your recaps Amanda. You’re genius.

  • Maeve

    This “Dr” guy is a CON! On RHOA, he says 3 times that he got his PhD degree from ASHFORD University (which doesn’t offer PhD degrees). Meanwhile, on his website ( it says he got his PhD from ASHWOOD University, a diploma mill which says on the website “pay $699 and we will sent you a piece of paper that says you are a doctor based on your life experiences” ( The ‘accreditation’ boards that Ashwood cites are made up- I know this as I work in Higher Ed and have a REAL Master’s degree in Higher Education Administration from one of the top universities in the US. This guy is such a scam, he can’t even remember the name of the fake university he got his “degree” from!!!

  • Ladonna

    All of these people are crazy on this show. The only one with any sense at all is Lawrence and they don’t show enough of him calling people on their shit. Kim is alright but she clearly hasn’t got a clue. Sheree is dumb as a box of rocks and Phaedra???Who did she pay to take the exams and the board? Greg needs to go, my girl Nene is kool, but that man is not her type. Hes probably got some little hood rat stuck away somewhere who can’t possibly know, that when the money dries up-Greg won’t look near as good! Even still, I look forward to each and every episode, please bring back Dwight, even though he lies, I love the lies..Kandi is okay but shes starting to look a little frayed around the edges.

  • Velvet 1

    With those lips of hers, it is hard to understand just what she is trying to say. Someone needs to tell her to tone it down. African-American women don’t need big thickly-applied gloss. They look ridiculously like hookers. How the devil did anyone give her a law degree let alone do business. Ummmmhmmmmmmmmmmmmmm as she flaps her lips. Gross.

  • Smith

    darnit darnit darnit. i missed this ep! GRRRR. thanx for the recap. (ipad)

  • cl

    to this day, i can’t understand why phaedra would lie about her pregnancy. this is one of the few episodes that i can’t stand watching because i do not like liars, especially unnecessary ones like hers! her mom can do the math… she just refuses to (ipad)

  • Sherry

    :) (ipad)

  • Sherry

    rhoa (ipad)

  • Jen

    Still haven’t caught this. (ipad)

  • helen

    Mutant Chinese baby?? Guess I must’ve watched the show to understand. (ipad)