At some point before the end of the season, an episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is going to take place entirely in Beverly Hills, right? I mean, I feel like it has to, but then again, I’ve never been to Beverly Hills. Is there not anything to do there except shop? Or are the California ladies just so rich that they might as well fly around and do whatever they please? At this point, we might as well call them the Real Housewives of the United States of America.

Last night, everyone except for Adrienne jetted off to New York City to see the opening of Kelsey’s play, and although the play itself didn’t actually happen last night, some other stuff did that was at least adequately entertaining. And, as always, Bravo made us wait until the last minute to see the promised fight.

We started with Lisa, whose gay houseboy Cedric is still…there. He still lives there, and he shall never leave, no matter what Lisa tells herself. If you lived there, would you ever move out? I wouldn’t. I’d spend my days dressing Giggy up in silly outfits and drinking tea and gossiping with Lisa about the other housewives forever. Who needs a husband when you have a Real Housewife? Cedric’s not just a houseguest, though, he’s also a sort-of employee. He helps Lisa with her duties at the restaurants, including (but not limited to) arranging giant flower arrangements. Lisa’s so proud of his progress at work that she thinks that might be able to live on his own like a normal person one day. Just not if he has any say in the matter.

Over in Camille’s corner of the world, she was still hanging out and gossiping with that hot Nick dude with whom she, ahem, “plays sports.” Lots and lots of vigorous, physical, sweaty sports. He’s the one who showed up in Vegas and got a little handsy for the cameras. Remember him? Well, apparently he had yet to hear Camille’s sob story about the snarky comment that Kyle may or may not have made like eight episodes ago, which Camille is still upset about, even though Lisa was present for the conversation and said she didn’t think it was a big deal. Camille rejects your version of reality and substitutes her own.

At Taylor’s house, Kyle came to visit and we were formally introduced to Snowball the Unwanted Puppy. Luckily for Taylor, she got to shove the dog at the nanny and run off to shop for dresses with Kyle, which, as best as I can tell, is more or less what she does every day. Clearly the dog is such a burden. They went to Petro Zillia to get dresses for their trip to New York City to see Kelsey open La Cage aux Folles on Broadway, and there’s really not anything else to say about that. Watching people shopping isn’t all that fun, really.

Kim and Adrienne ended up at a different (but similarly decorated) boutique doing the same thing, which just goes to prove that no matter how many dresses you already have, you still need a new dress for an event. Things were going fine with all the shopping, but then Adrienne got a phone call of the seriously sad variety – her uncle had passed away. She went into that sort of wide-eyed shock that hits you when you’ve received news so bad and so sudden that you process it intellectually before your emotions have the opportunity to catch up, and understandably, she ditched her shopping trip and went home right away. Because of the sudden family emergency, Adrienne wouldn’t be able to accompany the group to New York City to see Kelsey’s play.

Before the rest of the group could leave, though, Lisa had to do something about the flying anxieties that Kyle had on previous trips. Instead of just throwing a couple of extra Xanax her way (Oh come on, you know that at least one of these ladies is packing a prescription. I’d check Taylor for extra drugs first.), Lisa hired a hypnotherapist to come to Kyle’s house and hypnotize the fear of flying straight out of her. He stuck some weird thing to Kyle’s forehead and measured her brain waves (I’m pretty sure you can’t do that with an electrode and a laptop), and then the breathing exercises and hand movements started.

I’ve never been hypnotized, although I know people who claim that it works, so I hope you’ll pardon me for not commenting on the veracity of the hypnotherapist’s claims. (Although it kind of looked like BS. Does that count as a comment? It probably does.) He didn’t actually say anything about flying for the entire session, at least not that I heard, and perhaps what we saw was just the placebo effect at work – Kyle’s anxiety was gone because she was told it would be. And if that’s the case, Linda should have just cut out the middle man and tossed Kyle an Aspirin on the plane. Tell her it’ll get rid of her anxiety, et voila, Kyle is completely calm. It’s the same thing that happens with college freshman who think they’re wasted after four sips of a Long Island iced tea, and it works beautifully.

Already in New York, Camille gave us an impromptu tour of her family’s city apartment. And for once, Camille showed an iota of self-awareness: after she said that a 3500 square foot apartment was too confined for her, she admitted that it must sound obnoxious. Not only that, but once Kelsey arrived home, I actually felt a bit bad for her. He looked thrilled to see the kids and completely annoyed that she even bothered to show up for the family reunion. I thought I might enjoy seeing Camille get punched in the face by the end of her marriage, but I’m actually glad that I don’t so far. It means I’m still human. Sort of. Give me another year of Real Housewives, I’m sure Bravo can fix that.

Or, really, just one more scene with Camille might do the trick. You see, her mother lives in New Jersey and they rarely get to see each other because Camille is just so busy ordering around the help back in California, and since she was on the East Coast for once, they got together at…a nail salon. But Camille’s mom didn’t get a manicure, she just sat there and tried to make conversation while Camille got her nails done. Did I mention that her mom was also being treated for cancer? Treated with chemotherapy, which, if you’re not familiar, sucks just about every ounce of humanity out of your bones. And mom sat there, mostly silent, and listened to Camille complain about how exhausted she was, on and on for god knows how long, while getting her nails filled in. And now I have to stop and take a breath, or I’m going to use some truly awful words and lose my job. Feel free to mentally insert the appropriate profanity here.

Meanwhile, the rest of the ladies were hiking through LAX in stilettos, trying to figure out the whole issue of Kyle’s and Camille’s conflict. Kyle insisted that all she did was act surprised that Kelsey wouldn’t be joining Camille in Hawaii, and then Camille took that and assumed it to mean that Kelsey was the only important person in the family. As I mentioned a few weeks ago when this “storm in a bloody teacup” actually happened, that seems as plausible to me as anything. If Lisa, who witnessed the interaction, thinks Camille needs to get over it and stop taking things so personally, I believe her. Lisa wouldn’t lie to us. Giggy doesn’t tolerate that sort of foolishness.

Once in New York, everyone air-kissed and pretended to like Camille and adorably, they were all outfitted in standard-issue New York black. Kyle pulled Camille aside to set things straight and make sure everyone was on the same page about what was or was not said in Vegas, which actually seemed rather mature in the context of Real Housewives. The conversation went fine for a little while, even if it was obvious that neither of the people involved in it were terribly interested in forming a bond with one and other. Sometimes you just have to pretend a little bit so that you’re not the girl who can’t get along with everyone’s mutual friend, right?

Except somehow, the subject turned to shyness (Camille’s shy? Does anyone believe that? I can hardly believe she managed to say it with a straight face) and then insecurity, and we got to see first-hand how Camille spins a relatively harmless, off-the-cuff comment into a total and epic shitstorm. She made the crazy eyes. I felt unsafe.

To me, it didn’t seem like Kyle meant anything bad by using the word “insecure.” Camille was going on and on about being very shy, and shyness and insecurity can be strongly linked in certain situations. When you’re babbling at someone who you’ve offended and you’re trying to make it better, sometimes the exact right word doesn’t come out, although in the context of the conversation, I’m not sure it was really an inaccurate description. Either way, it certainly didn’t seem like Kyle was actively trying to be passive-aggressive, and even if she was, it was hardly a truly nasty thing to say when you consider all the totally awful, totally accurate things one might say to Camille Grammer.

Oddly, Camille seemed like she agreed with me until the group got downstairs to have dinner, at which point she decided that the use of the word “insecure” was actually meant to insult and demean her. Maybe she found a crazy pill in the elevator on the way down. Whatever happened, she decided that she would not tolerate the use of those kinds of words, even when she prompts them by trying to blame her rude phone skills on her “shyness.” She’s Camille effing Grammer, after all. Does Kyle even know who her husband is?

Luckily, this time, Bravo got the whole situation on tape so that we don’t have to speculate about what was and wasn’t said, and Camille may very well be headed to Kelly Bensimon territory with her satchels of gold and gummy bears on the vine. Kyle told her not to feel insecure after she claimed to be almost painfully shy, and to her, that was some sort of insult and it will not be tolerated. Well, it will only be tolerated for a few minutes, after which, Camille shall have a fit. And have a fit she did! Although we’ll have to wait until next week to see most of it, at which point Kim apparently jumps in and makes everyone else look sane. She’ll be playing the Ramona Singer character to Camille’s Kelly this season – someone pour her some pinot grigio.

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Share Your Thoughts With Us

  • PhotoGirl

    A shy pole dancer.
    Right. I’m actually beginning to wonder why it took Kelsey 13 years to make a run for it.
    Balmain should send Camille that golden satchel you just wrote about. It’s perfect.

    • S

      There are a ton of shy entertainers out there. As a dancer I am amazed at how many seemingly shy people get out there and take on a different persona when they have to perform. I think that’s the case with Camille. However I think her loony switch from “we’re cool” to “no, we we’re not cool” can probably be attributed to her obvious insecurity issues. I think Kim nailed it when she said it takes a certain type of person to be friends with/married to a celeb. Clearly Camille is not secure enough which is demonstrated by her comments” “I have big commitments” and “I have more to do than any other housewife.” Her strange bragging proves that she’s trying to overcompensate for something…
      I hope Kim doesn’t say anything too crazy next week! I have a soft spot for her because her sister did some major bad mouthing about Kim which made most of the viewers dislike her. Yet I haven’t heard Kim say anything negative about Kyle so far – she even defends her. You never know what to expect from these ladies though.

      • Lorie

        I’m glad you pointed that out. I don’t believe I’ve heard Kim say one negative thing about Kyle ever. But Kyle is always quick to criticize Kim.

    • Dee

      Loves it!

  • MsBubbly

    OMG! I hated Camille’s interview when she was talking about her ‘winning’ she said “the person who remains calm is the winner, I win Kyle ” and she said it in that annoying condescending voice…I wanted to just SMACK her!!!!

    • Ugh, that was TERRIBLE. I guess we know why she feels like she has license to be an awful person – she can say whatever she wants, and as long as she doesn’t raise her voice, there’s no way that she can lose, in her mind.

  • Anna

    I agree with the Nail Salon scene, I wanted to slap Camille! You can’t take an hour out of your “busy” schedule to have a decent get together with your sick mother! Awful.

  • Lorie

    You know – I was willing to give Camille the benefit of the doubt UNTIL that whole scene with her Mom in the nail salon. She can’t be bothered to actually go see her Mom because her nails are more important. And poor Mom barely gets a word in about how she feels and how chemo is going because Camille can’t shut up for three seconds about her exhausting life. No wonder Kelsey isn’t happy to see her. I’m surprised he lasted 13 years.

    Camille is shy? Really? REALLY? Shy people don’t grind it for the camera. Shy people don’t kiss and hang all over their husband’s friend. Shy people don’t entertain a group of your friend’s husbands with stories about how their breasts are so amazing. Puh-lease.

    I just don’t know how she manages. I’m exhausted. I think I need a spiritual retreat to Hawaii with my staff.

    • I have a really easy time liking all of the BH Housewives – EXCEPT for Camille. I tried to give her a chance too, but the nail salon scene was AWFUL. I was talking to Amanda during it and it was actually making me MAD. She only talked about herself, all me, me, me. And her mom just listened. No matter how the producers edited the scene, Camille should never have said how tired she is with her exhausting life in front of her sick mom.

      I really really like Lisa by the way!

      • Lorie

        I really, really like Lisa too! :-)

      • Ping

        I totally agree with you Meg! I never cared for the self centered /self absorbed vapid Camillie…but each wk she manages to top her own obnoxiousness. The scene with her mother is ridiculous. I can’t believe she couldn’t visit her mom at her mother’s house! (even with her own driver)..why didn’t she take her kids to her mother’s house? this girl has a chip on her shoulder…she wanted to only SHOW OFF her “glamour” life as Mrs. Kelsey Grammer (as much as she wants to stand off as her own person, she is a nobody wo his name..not b/c he’s famous, but I’m not sure if she ever did anything redeeming).
        Camillie made a big deal out of Kyle’s comment bc she wanted to creat drama b/c she doesn’t really do anything aside from being Frasier’s wife!

    • S

      Me too! I was trying not to dislike her since Camille is clearly insecure. But that scene was terrible. She has the means to go visit her mom. To think she was in Hawaii instead of visiting her mom and then not give her mom the opportunity to talk about what she was going through. Sad.

  • Ellen

    Take a look at this from the “The Daily Beast”:”But Camille and the Beverly Hills Housewives are literally in a different class. In 2003, Forbes estimated that the Maloof family fortune was worth $1 billion. Kelsey Grammer is worth a reported $85 million, and Camille says she’s getting “above $40 million” in the divorce. As for Kim Richards, although her sister chides her about not being good with money, according to House of Hilton by Jerry Oppenheimer, a portrait of the Hilton family empire, when Kim divorced oil and entertainment mogul Marvin Davis’ son, Gregory Davis, “she is said to have gotten a settlement and child support from the Davises ranging from $20,000 a month that continues until the year 2009, and $23,000 a month for life, or until she remarries.” (She has not remarried.)”

    I bet $40 million could clear up a lot of insecurities!

  • Lisa in Oregon

    I thought the scene with Camille at the beginning of the episode was telling. She was sitting down to dinner “with friends” when in fact the “guests” consisted of her staff, Nick and a woman who I think is Nick’s wife. She was basically clinking wine glasses with people that are paid to be around her.

    I also think the irony is lost on her, in that her husband left her for another woman, while she paws all over another woman’s husband. (Nick)

  • PhotoGirl

    When Camille said she’d tested positive for the BRCA gene, I was sure that the next thing out of her mouth would be about how terrified she was for her daughter. But no!! At that moment, she lost me forever.

  • shallowgal

    Wait ~ I can’t be the only one that obsessed over Kyle’s LV leopard scarf through the entire episode, right?! lol. I guess all that shallow consumerism rubbed off on me.

    As for the women ~ only Lisa (and maybe Adrienne, I haven’t been a regular watcher) seems to have a personality that anyone could stand for more than 5 minutes ~ although Kyle seems to be OK too (but she belittles her sister a little bit too much).

    • I have that scarf in a purple color – and I am obsessed. I stared at it the entire time she was waiting at the airport and having random chat too!

    • Pegasus

      o, you are not the only one obsessed with Kyle’s scarf. But the problem I am having is that I also like the one she wore in the limo ride. It was grey with sequel and she wore it with her black outfit. Gorgeous. I canot even find the scenes so I can email it to my daughter and she can hep me find something similar. Any ideas?

  • ali

    The scene at the nail salon made me want to cry for Camille’s mother. Thank goodness Kelsey found her mother that great doctor. Because what would she do without Camille and Kelsey? Therefore, she should listen patiently to Camille gripe about her potential to get cancer, when mom’s already got it.

    I know narcissism is a given with the RH, but Camille’s got it bad. I would agree with Kyle that she needs to add a full-time therapist to her staff.

  • Dee

    Hey ladies, thanks for making me feel sane. We all seem to have watched the same episode unlike the people on the BravoTv site.

    I watched this episode on the Bravo site since I was out the time it aired.

    I could not believe that some of the comments on the site actually supports Camille and accused Kyle of attacking her. That “I Win” remark definitely did it for me though, she’s playing the game but the fact that she admitted it on camera just revealed her bad character.

    Good thing Lisa was there to lighten up the mood. I love how she tricked Kyle at first saying it was a sales man she was letting in instead of the hypnotist.

  • Sherry in Indy

    My sis and a girl @ work got me watching this version of RH (I just succumbed to the train wreck that is RHOA, I did not want the addiction to this as well!!)

    LOVE LISA (she should write a book or give a class on creating those fabuilous flower arrangements!), can barely tell the blondes apart, but that Camille-WOW!! I thought Pheadra was a hot BOUGHETTO mess!! Camille is definitely a plastic, passive aggressive BOUGHETTO MESS!!

    Can wait to see what else she “wins”……..

  • arlene

    Agree with everyone. Love Lisa and her dog the best. Camille as Kelly B from the RHNY, TOTALLY AGREE!!!

  • Lisa

    Being from the East Coast I would like to see something of Beverly Hills, it looks great. Maybe Lisa and Adrienne will take the lead and reflect on how foolish the others looked the 1st season and do something philanthropic. The exceptions seem to be Lisa and Adrienne both appear to very grounded and pleasant, if they weren’t they would not be as successful as they are.

    We see very little but what the producers want to show, but you cannot cover-up self centered behavior like Camille, she should be ashamed of herself. I hope she has a substantial pre-nup she will need it, I don’t see evidence of lots of marketable talent in the event she winds up on her own. In conclusion if I were doing business with Russell as an investor and I got wind of $60k being spent on his childs birthday celebration I would pull my money and invest elsewhere, that is not a good look. Happy Holidays

  • Bri

    Who knows what kind of bag, Taylor is carrying in the picture with Kyle, Kim and Lisa.

    • That’s a Louis Vuitton Lockit in suhali leather!

      • NCGal

        Who’s Megs Mahoney Dusil and why does she get the special Amanda Mull peach box…like yours?
        I am soooo confused.
        Anyway, Camille, Sheree, that blonde with the fishlips and the creepy husband from RHOC, Michaela, and Bensimone need their own UNreality show. “If there’s a rock and roll heaven…”
        You wait, the whole rest of the RHBH season is going to be about Camille whining on being “bullied” by the other women.
        Watching these ladies is somehow different than the others. I get the feeling from these gals that they actually believe their press.

      • Hahaha, Megs is my boss! Without her, none of this would be possible and I’d probably have to get up at a reasonable time in the morning.

  • Juliet

    After watching this episode, my love for Kyle has solidified! She is my absolute favorite Housewife of all time, followed by Lisa and then Adrienne. Kim doesn’t bother me nearly as much as she should. However, I cannot stand Taylor or Camille – both of them are way too conceited and whinny for my taste.

    P.S. I do not care for Taylor’s Louis Vuitton bag. I don’t know why, it’s jut not something I would carry. But, I do love Kyle’s scarf. Maybe I’m a little biased because I have this scarf in both this version and the gray iteration; it is very soft and a great go to accessory to spruce up an otherwise dull outfit.

  • Tiffany

    Well I just watched the most recent episode..and I still can’t stand Camille!
    I feel she needs a therapist also, Kyle was really trying to make amends and Camille was all like everything was good. Then dinner came and she wanted to start it up again! WTH?!
    Then when it went to her part about where she was remaining calm and was the winner in that situation..I was like yea u lose Camille! Your husband left you! So there! Anyhoo I like Kyle and Lisa the most on this season…Kim is so-so..and Taylor I sooo dislike! Just something about her..

    I am so glad they did a RHBH! It was long overdue!

  • Melissa H.

    Who makes this scarf and where can a girl get it?

    Looking forward to next week’s episode – somehow Kim is going to start another fight at the same dinner table?! I wish Kyle had just said, “I didn’t mean that you were insecure; I meant to say shy. You were so sweet to invite us all here. You must be so excited!” or something to completely change the subject and put the attention on Camille which is all Camille wanted from the beginning. But it’s understandable that when someone continues to accuse you of saying something you didn’t say and have already apologized profusely for (hand to God, hand to God!) that one might get super defensive.
    I wonder if Kelsey Grammer watches this show and pats himself on the back? It’s terrible that he cheated on her; no one deserves that. But I have to reiterate my comment from last week that he’s lapping it up and congratulating himself – he just looks better and better every week..
    I watched a rerun today and noticed this time around that when he comes into the apartment and is trying to only kiss her on the cheek, she gets one in on the lips; the camera angle changes and you can see he’s wiping his upper lip off. She does wear mass lip gloss but I still found this interesting knowing what happens later…

  • pursemonkey

    I’m completely sucked into this season!! This epi just solidifies what I already thought of Camille: vapid, narcissistic, delusional fruitcake. The scene at the nail salon with her mom made my skin crawl. And I feel for Kyle – she seems to have been dragged into this drama based solely on Camille’s twisted perception of one conversation.
    So far I really like Lisa, Adrienne and Kyle. Kim is a hot mess but she’s growing on me for some reason, Taylor needs to take a child development class STAT, and Camille needs a reality check and a swift kick in the arse.

  • Jennifer

    Loved this episode, & add me to the list of people that would like to knock Camille into next week! Yes, she made the crazy eyes -what a nut! If nothing else, just DROP IT. Kyle apologized & that was that. Kyle & Lisa are definitely my faves, followed by Kim (she is kind of endearing) & then Adrienne & Taylor. Did anyone else read the Life & Style or maybe it was InTouch that did profile on all the surgery that the ladies had? The article said Taylor was mom of 4? Misprint…?

  • Lilac

    First time watching a housewives show and I am loving this series. Admire and love Lisa, Adrienne, and Kyle. Hate Camille and Taylor. Taylor is the “poorer” version of Camille. Taylor is such a social climber. She sucks up to Adrienne and Camille but hates on Kim- who may be her equal or less in terms of monetary value. I think she’d suck up to Lisa more but Lisa is too smart to believe in her fake personality. I think she doesn’t like Lisa and would try to start something with her if Lisa wasn’t so rich. Everything that comes out of her trout lips is a contradiction to her real life. She fell in love with her douchebag of a husband at first sight and married for love? Come on. I was embarrassed for her when she told everyone how she pursued him for 3 months.

    In her blog, Taylor admits she instigated the situation between Camille and Kyle by mentioning something Kim had said to her at the airport. It makes sense that Taylor was trying to become closer to Camille and threw Kim under the bus in order to make conversation.

    I have no respect for Camille between the way she tried to one up her cancer ridden mother about how tired she was over vacationing in Hawaii. Ugh. Anyone else catch how after the call with Adrienne, she hoped nothing else would go wrong for the premiere? Like Adrienne’s deceased uncle should have known better than to interfere with Kelsey’s big premiere. She’s a disgusting excuse for a human being. I believe that she choose to twist Kyle’s words on a day when there was no filming because she wanted more screen time. She’s insane. Kyle is pretty good at making friends and so I’m sure she knows what is appropriate conversation and what isn’t. She may be frank with her sister but it doesn’t make any sense why she’s say anything close to what Camille is accusing her of. All of Camille’s “friends” seem to be hired help. I wonder what her “tennis partner” Nick does to have so much free time to hang out with her during the day. Unless he gets paid to be her “friend”. In the first few episodes Lisa and Kyle were the main draw. With this fight, Camille is getting a lot more screen time.

  • ekaterina211

    Loved this episode! Camille…I feel sorry for her as she is clearly insecure and aware she is losing her Husband, but she is so obnoxious an cruel to her mother that it’s hard to symphatize at all.
    Could anyone ID the shoes that Lisa is wearing in the airport scene? I couldn’t even concentrate on what people said between them and Kyle’s scarf!

  • mochababe73

    I loved this episode so much that I saved it on my DV-R. I can’t wait until this season comes out on DVD. These are my favorite housewives right now.
    The scene with the four of them walking through the airport dressed as though they are going out on town was by far my favorite of any of the housewives. Their airport style made me feel like a schlub in my everyday wear.
    Camille is an airhead.
    Three words: I LOVE KYLE!
    She keeps it real and reminds me of Ramona but with a much better mouth filter.

  • Amy

    lol i love the Kelly/Camille reference! LOVE it lol

  • Latin Fly Girl

    Camille – you are a royal bitch, you think you are SO cute with that little girl voice and pretending to be secure. You are the must insecure person I have seen in these reality shows. Oh and by the way, you need more botox in your forehead is wearing off. No wonder Kelsey couldn’t take it anymore you are annoying and fake, but I understand is BH the land of fakeness and pretend.
    Kyle – you ROCK
    Kim – go back to witch mountain, you seem to be stuck there anyway
    Lisa – you ROCK too
    Taylor – one word PATHETIC
    Adrienne – take that glitter of your hair, is not cute in a grown woman. You are beautiful enough

  • Pegasus

    Still looking for that grey scarf that Kyle wore at the scene where they ar coiming back from NY> It has sequence and she wore t with a black outfit. Beautiful!!! Anybody noticed it? I have a hard time concentrating on what they talk about b/c I love their outfits and accessories. I’m glad they play reruns!


    the ladies are at it again (ipad)


    this was a good episode (ipad)

  • Jen

    Holy plastic surgery! (ipad)

  • helen

    Ha – I assumed it was all in Beverly Hills – but again, I don’t watch it. (ipad)