You knew that when the Real Housewives of New York City Reunion started with Andy Cohen asking if anyone had taken a Xanax before taping started, we were in for…well, we were in for something. It may have been good or bad, depending on how you look at it. We didn’t get to see the best bits tonight since this is a two (or maybe three? Did anyone else catch Andy Cohen saying three? Is he trying to kill me?) part reunion, but there were some things worth mentioning nonetheless.

Because it’s basically impossible to recap a non-narrative screaming match in the way that we normally do, I thought we’d take this opportunity to reflect on the reunion and the season as a whole. It’s time to discussed what we’ve learned.

My new goal in life is to never turn into Jill Zarin. My goal in life used to be to never end up on I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant, but after seeing Jill passive-aggressively plow herself through the lives of various and sundry housewives, I think that not conducting my life in a similar way is a much more worthy pursuit. So thanks for that, Jill. It’s good that I have something to strive for.

Ramona has what can only be described as Snarky Tourette’s. The montage of every horrific thing she’s said this season was tremendous, as was the replay of her alien runway walk. When Kelly admonished her for saying that she sometimes calls Avery stupid, without missing a beat, she shut her down by saying, “I don’t. I just gave that as an example to make you feel better.” Later, Ramona tried to get up and wander off to have a drink while Kelly was talking. She also couldn’t remember how old she is. I think I love Ramona.

Kelly’s version of events continues to have little, if anything, in common with objective reality. She still believes that Bethenny planted things about her in the press, but she won’t explain where the item was, what it said, if it ever ran, or why she thinks Bethenny is the one that did it. Saying any of those things would be beneath her, because she really doesn’t want to talk about it, she just wants to bring it up, have it taken as fact, and move on. Also, she thinks the time that Ramona called her stupid was the worst thing that Ramona has ever said on the series, which I think we all know is verifiably untrue. Ramona has said way meaner things than that. Also, Kelly actually is stupid, so Ramona gets points for being correct.

The Bethenny/Jill fight wasn’t really about anything that was mentioned during the season. It was about Jill’s raging jealousy over Bethenny’s new show. Jill tried to get Alex and Ramona to not film with Bethenny to dampen interest in Bethenny Getting Married, which Jill denies but Ramona and Alex both swear is true. Since Jill gets the nervous face when she lies, I’m going to have to side with the couch on the left.

In fact, let’s talk about the couches for a second. The housewives were obviously split into teams with Bethenny and Jill as their captains, and the body language coming from each side couldn’t have been more different. It’s possible that the evil living in Jill, Kelly and LuAnn has started to eat them from the inside out and that’s what caused their facial expressions for the entire hour, but they all sat there frowning, fidgeting and muttering to themselves like surly teenagers that had been hauled into the principal’s office.

Jill’s only redeeming quality is her choice in accessories. Her dress and her extensions were bad, but her sky-high green suede Louboutins and armful of awesome bracelets were the fashion highlight of the reunion for me. The big yellow one with the green and blue crystals in the middle – what was that? Tom Binns maybe? I’m on an as-yet-fruitless internet search for it.

This portion of the reunion was decidedly mediocre – all they did was talk about stuff that we’ve all heard them talk about before. I’m hopeful that the next two parts of the reunion will be more interesting, and in all likelihood, they will be. No one on the Surly Couch has been directly questioned yet, and I’m betting that the real fireworks happen when Andy turns his attention on them. Please, for the love of god, let him ask Kelly whether or not she actually thinks Bethenny wants to kill her.

Programming Note: the second part of the reunion airs on Monday but my recap will be posted on Wednesday as a result of previously scheduled Real Housewives of New Jersey ridiculousness.

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Share Your Thoughts With Us

  • Kim

    I also noticed the very same bracelet on Jill – if you find it, please let us know!

  • MiMi

    YAY Amanda! I’ve been stalking my comptuer all morning. Great recap! Can’t wait for Part II (and possibly Part III?)

  • PhotoGirl

    I’m thinking Erickson Beamon for the bracelet, perhaps, but I haven’t found it, yet.

    • I found a Tom Binns piece that had some similar yellow stones, but nothing more than that. Keep me updated if you find it, I’d love to buy one. I love giant jewelry like that.

      • Marjmoore

        Hi Amanda,
        Sorry for butting in, but do you know whose belt Alex was wearing at Ramona’s wedding? It looks Hermes -ish.
        Thanks Much

      • I don’t remember noticing a belt. If you have a Twitter account, you can ask her there – she’s @mccordalex. She’s pretty good about responding to questions about her clothes!

  • Matthew

    There are definitely three parts. Part two is Monday. Part three is Thursday. I might just let my DVR record them both and wait until Thursday to watch them. Being all broken up is kind of irritating.

    Jill looked like such an a-hole last night, it wasn’t funny. Bethenny skewered her, but it really wasn’t about Bethenny. It was about her calling Jill out for who she is. And let’s face it. It was three against one on whether or not Jill lied about trying to sabotage Bethenny’s show. She loses.

    I thought Alex did a better job of formulating her thoughts than during the season. I think she very much planned what she wanted to say and it showed. The three clear-cut season winners sat on the couch on the left.

  • JenG

    So the entire fight with Bethenny was over jealousy. Jill was upset that Bethenny was getting her own show. Jill really is a mean girl!

  • Anny

    I love your recaps!!! great job

  • carla

    Perhaps Andy should have asked Ramona if she had any “procedures” rather then “surgery”. Like a Catholic schoolgirl, she seemed to not want to admit she’s an every but girl ;-)

  • Team Ramona

    I unashamedly adore Ramona.

    I love your line about Ramona having “Snarky Tourette’s.” But I am not even sure it’s Tourette’s.

    I think she knows exactly what she’s doing. She waits and then throws in her zinger when it’s least expected, gets maximum impact, and then acts all innocent. Like at Jills Saks’ party when she asked Kelly about her boobs. I died.

    • Kim

      I never even noticed Kelly’s boobs until that comment, now whenever they are hanging out (seems like at least once a show) I can’t get over what a bad boob job she has. Geez, NYC has so many plastic’s people, she has the money to go to the best, and she got those?? No wonder Ramona asked her, she was probably thinking “Really, your going to show all of America your bad boob job? I’m concerned.” lol

  • S

    I like Ramona too. She really calls everyone out. She’s crazy and I don’t think I’d ever be close friends with someone like her in real life (way too much drama) but I like that she tries to say what she feels. Still not sure about Bethany – I feel like she’s eating up the fact that most viewers are against Jill. I also loved the part on the bridge where she calls Bethany a press monger. I know this is an unpopular belief, but I kinda believe that Bethany talked trash about Kelly to the press. It may be sadly true things that she said, but I don’t doubt that she said it. Can’t wait for Sonya. What happened to the other housewife?

    • ZazuMcGoo1

      S – for what it’s worth after Kelly stated that Bethenny had made statements about her and her family I SCOURED (yes, I admit I have no life :-) the internet and came up with not one article/blog/tweet/etc where B was bashing K’s family. Of course B has been asked and has answered questions about Kelly and all the other HWs as they have about her. Basically there is no proof of B ever went after K’s family.

      • Kim

        I was wondering about that myself. In general, I have no idea what outlets they are talking about when they talk about “the press,” but I’m guessing it’s nothing more than Page Six. I did a quick check on that site and didn’t find anything.

      • Tess

        I think the smear campaign is a product of Kelly’s imagination — as was her comment (at lunch with Luanne, Jill and Jennifer) that Bethenny admitted on St. John’s that she had planted the stories.

  • Hannah

    OMG i said that SAME thing about Jill!
    my friends & i had a viewing party and i said flat out during commercial break that my biggest fear in life is turning into Jill!!! i was horrified (not shocked or surprised though) that she told the other housewives to not film w/Bethenny so her new show would fizzle out! one second she is crying to her and begging to be back friends with her and then behind the scenes she is telling everyone she sucks and to stay away from her!

    also bethennys new show was like a breath of fresh air!! no drama, just the cuteness of her being pregnant and her doting husband and her non-dramatic friends! she was so cute on andys after show saying how her show is dessert after a heavy meal (comparing it to housewives) and i couldnt agree more.

    jill is a psychopath and her and stupid kelly need to be nixed immediately!

    • Kim

      What I didn’t understand, and maybe someone can help out here, is when Luann (supporting her BFF, as always) said it’s a strategy – and at the beginning of each season people decide who they’re going to shoot with? Huh? Maybe I didn’t hear it right???

  • Hannah

    ALSO rebecca minkoffs having a sale!!! i just got the morning after mini for 300 and it was 550!!

  • NCGal

    The ONLY reason why Jil is showing any contrition for her horrible behavior is because she is so loathed by everyone with two brain cells who watches the show. This didn’t come from a deep place of introspection and epiphany it came from being roundly and publicly hauled out and busted by BRAVO the other women. When confronted, she had the audacity to tell Bethanny she has “changed” from, I think she referenced, a week ago???!!! Really??? Systemic change in a week? She is a narcissist and a bully and as such cannot stand the bright white light of truth and integrity. She needs to take this hiatus and spend some time doing the real work of interpersonal change. She needs to get her sh** together or she’s in for an awful crash and burn.
    My real sadness is for her daughter…God can you imagine what that poor girl is going to have to endure for the rest of her life? If I was her I would go to college someplace so removed from the insanity of RHONY so I could remake myself independent from my mean, crazy and sad mother. Oy Vey, indeed!!!

    • Relli


  • Matthew

    What did you think of “Bethenny Getting Married?”

    • I actually thought it was kind of sweet. Bethenny has always been my favorite, though, since she and I have similar senses of humor, so I figured I’d enjoy it. For anyone that finds Bethenny grating, well, it isn’t the show for them.

      • Matthew

        I like her too. She’s definitely my fav of all the housewives in all the cities. But I think I overdid it yesterday on Bethenny. RH reunion, BGM?, Bethenny on WWH, plus she was on the View.

        I’m pretty sure I dreamed about her last night.

      • I skipped her View appearance and wasn’t really paying attention to WWHL, but if I had consumed all of that Bethenny media in one day, I think I might have had dreams about her as well. Thursday was National Bethenny Day, apparently.

      • Matthew

        Actually writing down how much Bethenny I experienced on Thursday is a little embarrassing. I’m not going to lie…

  • Relli

    I saw bits of this and Watch what Happens. You gotta to give it to B, she knows how to handle the press and the fame, she not only stood up for Jill but she also admitted to Andy that it wasn’t fair for everyone to be ganging up on Jill. [Sidenote: did anybody see that crazy report where “fans” were stalking Jill and showing up at her home to harass her and she blamed it on B giving out her address!?!?!] That Jill’s behavior was came from fame going to her head.

    I believe this, the first seasons of these shows are always great because they are unaware and genuine. The second season is always BAD because they are basically really long infomercials hawking some garbage that they swear by because they all start believing their hype. Like Nene going crazy last season (oh gawd her new nose is AWFUL she looks like her main gay now) they play up what they think their “fans” want to see, and their ego’s take over their head. I think that after Andy dubbed them Shirley & Laverne after the 1st season Jill thought that hey maybe we should……… The difference with B is that she has talent and basically told us from the jump this was about her brand. Jill is a very attractive woman who married well and that’s about it. I believe she probably discouraged other from filming with B because some people need others to follow their lead in order to feel justified about their actions.

    Maybe i am just sensitive to this topic because after I fell in love and had a baby there were friends who were not as happy and supportive of my decisions as thought they would be and like B, some just had to go because there was no room for them in this chapter of my life.

  • kris

    great recap…it’s funny that Jill/Luann acted surprised about the whole ‘teams’ thing, but remember early in the season when Kelly and Bethenny decided to bury the hatchet, and then Jill sent Kelly an e-mail+ confronted her at bklyn fashion week about being friends w. B again…JZ is so full of it

  • suz

    Did anyone notice how fidgety, disconnected and sad Kelly looked when she thought the camera was not on her? She is one weird chick who doesn’t seem to be getting any better. How sad there seems to be no one in her life willing to intervene and steer her toward some kind of help. Meanwhile, she’s pretty repulsive looking and acting, but does keep things interesting.

    • Matthew

      Well, in her defense, she’s crazy.

      Oh and she hates the girls on the other couch, so why bother paying attention?


  • Kim

    Yes, I noticed she was like a mopey 13-year-old. Looking at her hands, not paying attention. Like, “wake me up when we start talking about ME.”

    • suz

      Exactly! You hit the nail on the head!

  • melissa

    I find it funny that they each get offended when called a “media whore”, when in fact isn’t that exactly what you are if you are on a reality show????

    • “Media whore” is what people call you when they’re pissed that you’re getting more press than they are. All of these women would show up at the opening of a Shoney’s in rural Arkansas if they thought a camera might be there, so it’s patently ridiculous that any of them would accuse any of the others of seeking TOO MUCH press.

  • mochababe73

    I enjoyed the Reunion show. Bethenny hit the nail on the head. It nice words, she basically told Jill that she was jealous. And to tell the other housewives not to film with her was mean. The fact that Bethenny surpassed Jill is eating at her, and you can tell.
    I love riding the Ramona Coaster.
    Alex still can’t get her hair together.
    Kelly needs serious psychological help. NOW!
    Lu Ann can’t sing.

    • Kim

      Hey, I thought Alex’s hair looked nice enough.

  • Sher77

    Amanda, loved the Shoney’s in Arkansas remark!! Too true and too funny. Bethenny’s explanation, about Jill’s jealousy ,because she had gotten her own show, finally made some sense of the argument.

  • Sofia Nolan

    you know what, I`m really starting to get bored of this

  • Camille

    Loved you recap! I’ve been checking for it on and off all day. You crack me up. My own personal “for the love of God” question that I hope gets answered is “For the love of God, will someone get Kelly to explain what she meant by “satchels of gold???”

    I wish I had played a drinking game for every time Jill said “I’m sorry” First she would deny everything, even calling Ramona a liar at one point, then after being forced to admit the truth, she’d then sort of grudging say “Well I’m sorry, I’m only human, So do we all, We all do that, I’ve changed, blah blah blah blah. So insincere and so NOT changed.

    Alex was wonderful, concise, articulate and assertive. Way to go Alex!

    Ramona is so crazy and can be so rude, but she seems to have good intentions and I’m loving her more and more. Kelly gets points however for the crack about Ramona’s bloodtype being pinot grigio.

    Kelly, ugh, so stunted socially, so dumb (did everyone see how she laughed when the fan mail called her a fly–an insult btw) sigh, just wish someone would call her on all her crazy stuff and get her to fess up to what she meant by satchels of gold? I’ve racked my brains. I guess I’ll have to watch what happens!

    • Kim

      Now that you mention it…this reminds me of something I was thinking last year (I think). It used to be that Bethanny would NEVER say I’m sorry. I remember watching something going down and thinking, “geez, that woman never let’s go – just admit you’re wrong, apologize and move on.” I wanted to just slap her. But this year, without losing her directness, she’s gained the ability to see that she’s been out of line and sincerely apologize. Good for her. Maybe next year Jill will learn what it means to sincerely apologize and to make AND effort to not be so hurtful.

    • kemilia

      YES!!!! Satchels of Gold!! That stuck in my mind as soon as Kelly said it a few weeks ago on the yacht and it was never referenced again. What did she mean?

      The girl is nuts, sadly, but I did love her shoes.

  • kemilia

    Another great recap. I agree with all the comments above pretty much and look forward to the next 2 Reunion shows (I double checked that Mr. TiVo knew about them and had them on his “to do” list).

    Kelly was just sitting there like a mope, she was frowning the entire time, and her walking off, geez. Ramona walked off too (or tried to) but that was a typically ditzy Ramona move. Andy has his hands full with those ladies.

    I was totally obsessed with Jill’s bangles–totally “wow”. Her shoes too. I keep on thinking, in the back of my little head, maybe she really isn’t as bad as she came off this season but then I come back to reality and realize that no, it is not editing, it is Jill being so not nice.

    I soooo hope the NY Housewives come back for another season, I grew to really like Sonja (?), and I can’t wait to hear her take on the craziness on the next 2 Reunion shows.

  • marce

    all the other show drama aside, has anyone been able to figure out where her bracelets are from? haha

  • amy

    i think writing the recap this way works great! loved it.

  • Bagolicious

    Jill- It’s really interesting how the “mean” girl can dish it, but can’t take it! And nearly every time she’s in the hot seat and can’t take it, she just walks away.

    Ramona- Ramona cracked me up when she said that she’s 54 and then immediately commented that she couldn’t remember how old she was although she feels only 36. Then, at some point, she was shown, getting up and wanting to leave as she was hot….hot, memory lost, “hot flash”, usually not a 36-year-old thing. LOL! I think Ramona is cool and SO comical.

    Kelly-One flew over the cuckoo’s nest. I really hope she gets some help. And she’s definitely not the brightest bulb in the bunch; coming in at about 60 watts. So she really needs to just not say much, as every time she opens her mouth, it makes her look even dimmer. A coherent thought couldn’t come out of her mouth if her life depended on it.

    Luanne- Just gets under my skin. Irritating. And for her to have the audacity to “scold” Alex for delivering the Bethenny message to Jill. And then to say to Alex,”And who made you God?”. Well, who made her God to butt into it as it was none of her business?

    Alex- To me she’s about as bland as minute rice. It’s good though that she finally showed some range of emotion when she went off on Jill this season. To let something build up, for three years, and then have to take three years for it to all come out, is just beyond strange to me since I’m one to confront situations as soon as they happen.

    Bethenny- I think she’s cool, intelligent, and has a quick mind. Plus, I like folks who just say things right out and upfront and get to the point. I love how she called Jill out about putting her husband’s illness on the air, her daughter’s weigh loss situation on the air, but then didn’t want to make up with her on the air. I think it’s good that she’s broken it off with Jill. Who needs such toxicity in one’s life and especially after getting married, having a baby, getting her own show, and having lots of other venues to deal with. Plus, her husband isn’t fond of Jill.
    I liked Bethenny’s new show. It was cute and relaxing and so great not to have to hear the loud,obnoxious, fog horn voice of Jill, listen to Kelly babble and spin out of control, or listen to Luanne’s know-it-all, butt-insky, advice. I do hope that Bethenny invites Ramona on her show though.

  • betty

    i did like bethenny’s show but have to admit i can’t imagine watching it more than 1 season. it doesn’t have enough drama for me. i hope she goes back to real housewives.

    i hope all the ladies stay on the show. eventhough, i find some cast members annoying (i think most people are in agreement on which ones they are), theydo add to the drama.

  • amy

    Bethenny was hilarious. I laughed out loud literally, when she was talking about she is not a fake bitch, walking around saying “darling” and smoking a cigarette. When she “air smoked” i couldn’t help but to bust out with laughter.

  • Tess

    At the risk of sounding repetitive, this is the best Real Housewives recap posted. I discovered it last night, read past recaps, then went to bed with a smile on my face. Good Work!!

    • suz

      Watch out. Next thing you know, you’ll even love reading about purses.

    • I’m glad you found us and like the recaps! I do all of the Real Housewives plus a few other shows, so I hope you’ll check back and continue commenting :-)

  • Melissa Klaer

    Does anyone know where I can get the green suede Christian Louboutins Jill was wearing? I am going crazy trying to find them!!!!

  • Penelope

    Anyone know whose the green bracelets are Jill is wearing? I know who made the big bracelet but I’m looking for the green one’s? Thanks