Donna Karan Drawstring Shoulder BagI drank a freakin’ gallon of sangria yesterday and I’m trying to stop my head from exploding all over my couch, so we’re going to get right to the point on this one: the Donna Karan Drawstring Shoulder Bag? It has a face. A FROG FACE. You see it, right?

The holes at the top corners are the eyes, and the top flap is the same shape as a frog’s upper lip, with one of the bag’s folds forming the lower lip. If it was green, it would be Kermit. And perhaps it would be better if it was, because it’s not doing a very good job of being a handbag. I can’t recall another bag that has left me so utterly confused as to what the designer was trying to accomplish. The body of the bag has a set of drawstrings running down each side and little loops hanging out the bottom, although I can’t see any way to hold the drawstrings in place if you wanted to scrunch up the bag. And why would you? That would just make it awkward to carry and give the inside of the bag lots of folds inside which your stuff could hide, never to be seen again. Plus, it looks like an amphibian. I’ll pass. Buy through Saks for $1595.

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