Novelty Bags

Spartacus was gorgeous right? The man I mean. I think so. Or maybe that is just how they portrayed him in the movies. But I do know that Brad Pitt looked amazingly gorgeous in Troy. Actually many of my guy friends (including you Vlad!) not only admitted to finding Brad Pitt gorgeous, but also admitted to watching the movie just for him. Yes, you men out there do actually judge other men. We all know it. And it is OK. So when I think of this Yves Saint Laurent Sparte Hobo, I am seriously reminded of Troy or Joan of Ark or Spartacus. I just could never see myself wearing it. The bag looks ancient. I am supposing that was the point, but still, not my style.

The YSL Sparte Hobo features front sided metallic leather fringe with goldtone hardware while the rest of the handbag is made of suede. The shoulder strap has adjustable buckles which you can alter to be as long as short as you like. If you are preparing to run around Troy with the bag, make sure you tighten the straps. The hobo has a hidden magnetic snap closure and is lined in satin and has an inside zip pocket. Sizing in at a burly 11″H X 12″L X 1″W this ancient bag can be yours for $995 at Saks.

How about them apples? This year, many designers take the forbidden fruit and slap it on their summer bags, e.g. Luella did with her Gisele. Others take the trend and turn their bags into the fruit itself. What comes out of this metamorphosis is the Pollini Apple Bag. The italian made handbag is made of all leather with a patent trim. The slim dual top handles are too short for the bag to be carried on the shoulder, but still visually work well with the overall appeal of the cute bag. An inside magnetic snap closure keep the apple closed, while an apple logo print covers its lining. Leather feetsies protect the bag from dirt when set down. Caught on to the taste? Then go ahead and grab the fruit for a sinful $475 via Zappos.

I’ve always been the little girl who loved army print. My brother had an entire Army outfit, from boots to hat, and would run around the house chasing me and ultimately putting me in prison. That sucked. But especially now, while we are at war, sporting Army print shows your support and love for our country. No matter what you think about the war, you have to know that these men and women there now need all the support we can give them. So I figured, for this Memorial Day, why not show-off some love for our country and the men and women that have and still are serving.

Today is also a dedication to my friend Phil. Phil is a good friend of mine who served our country and fought in Iraq. He was lucky enough to not only do well while there, but come home safe to his friends and family. Since I have been promising him a shout out on my site, I figured today would be a dedication to him and his fellow friends in the service. Phil has told me many stories, showed me many pictures, and deserves much respect and accolades for what he and all the others serving have done for us. I am sure many of you reader’s know someone who has or is still serving our country, so feel free to thank them and wish them luck in our comment section.

For starters, why not show off your red, white and blue via a Rolfs American Flag Novelty Coin Purse. This purse is made of leather with a star shaped zipper puller, back pocket and a keychain. For $15 at Rolfs, this purse to show your support to our country is the perfect little accessory.

Now I am getting to the fun part, because camouflage is really my thing. Let’s face it girls, a man in camouflage just makes you smile. Uniform is always nice (especially when it’s not your Catholic school uniform from grade school- ugh). Like I said before I have always been a fan of the army camo and I have fallen in more than love with these MZ Wallace bags. These bags are not just any bags; they are posh designer bags that sport love for our country on a beautifully designed bag. In their spring 2005 chain collection, MZ Wallace features three camo patterned bags: the Carlyle, the Roma, and the New York Tote. I want to focus on the Roma because I believe for any girl it is the perfect bag to show support and love of our country without being too over the top for many women. This bag is a classic handbag shape made with a pale desert camouflage quilted nylon canvas. The bag features a chain handle and is trimmed in Italian pebble grain leather. Other perks to the bag are the flap with swivel clip closure, large inside zipper pocket, cell phone pocket plus two additional multi-purpose pockets. And the coolest part is that this bag is water and stain resistant, which is good for any woman, because face it girls, we aren’t perfect. This MZ Wallace Roma costs $240, but is well worth each and every dollar of the price.

Aleya Handbags has given us the Rich Girls collection, camouflage satchels with metallic bronze trims. This kind of made me laugh a bit to have it be called the Rich Girls collection, but then again upon further inspection the bags were named the Nicole, Jessica, and Paris respectively. Actually really cool when you think about it; these well known girls have been given names on a line of camo bags. My favorite is the The Nicole Hobo in Camouflage. The Nicole Hobo is made of nylon canvas camouflage trimmed in bronze metallic leather and featuring luxurious gold hardware. This bag is able to sit comfortably on your shoulder and measures 18″ wide at the base and 10 1/2″ at center with bag closed and a depth of 5″. You can buy any of the Rich Girls collection online at Aleya, the Nicole Hobo in Camouflage is $200.

I am utterly disturbed by the sheer overwhelming femininity y0ny radiates out of that TFT of mine. While most of Dorrie Lane’s stuff makes me really grateful to have been born with a queue and a set of complementary balls, the Pussy Purse just hits my taste right on the spot. It’s the perfect accessory for any Jane Doe to manifest her emancipated femme that never broke through the physical shell, to attract curious looks and solicit her vagina in a… yeah… pocket kinda way, while John Doe might find replacement for his worn-out Fleshlight. Brilliant! While you are at it, why not satisfy your urge for play and get yourself a custom-made $400 Wondrous Vulva Puppet. Sheesh, I’ve seen my fair share of www weirdness over the years, but this just scares me. I would like to suggest to Dorrie to cut the hallucinogenic wonder stix and get laid. ‘Cuz you know she craves it bad when there’s pussy purses and puppets involved. For $12 through y0ni.com.

P.S. I feel the sudden need to engage in some male activity. Anyone up for some beer and football?

Eggs are made to be eaten, not worn. After finding these “egg” purses all we can ask ourselves is what is the fashion world coming to? Don’t get me wrong, the price tag is high and the adornments are lovely. Who would actually go out in public wearing one of these? With Easter on its way, Vivian Alexander released the Easter Egg Purse. This “bag” is decorated on the outside with pastel easter eggs lined with little gems on a pearly white background. The inside of the bag is lined with none other than the finest sand washed silk. Other perks to the bag include the removable gold strap and upon opening a large beveled mirror in the top.

As odd as we find the purse, we are not saying that Vivian Alexander’s work is not the most intricate and ornate work out there. The Vivian Alexander Imperial Coronation Egg was shipped to Rome and used in the filming of the highlight heist in Warner Bros. Ocean’s 12. Yet despite the accolades received on Alexander’s work, I would never ever be seen wearing his purses. After stumbling over this new “egg”purse all we can think is how rotten!