As much as we try to be nice around here, sometimes, we can’t help but let a little naughtiness seep in. You’ve probably had a similar feeling at some point this holiday season – when charged with buying a gift for someone who you just don’t really like, don’t you wish you could satisfy your baser urges and buy him or her something to subtly telegraph your displeasure? Be honest. We know you’re not that nice.
And neither are we! We’ve spent several weeks detailing great gift ideas for the people on your list who you love (or at least like), but now we’ve got a few funny ideas for people who you don’t. From subtly passive-aggressive to flat-out mean, here’s how we’d indulge our harsher feelings this holiday season.
Tom Ford Nail Polish in “Bitter Bitch”
$30 via Neiman Marcus
Tom Ford anything is a pretty nice gift, but the name of the shade says it all.
Kensie Fleece Union Suit
$52 via Nordstrom
An adult onesie in an eye-searing print? You shouldn’t have.
Donna Karan Cashmere Mist Deodorant
$15 via Nordstrom
This one’s best when delivered to the desk of the smelly person in your office with an anonymous note.
Eugenia Kim Jamie Knitted Beret
$154 via ShopBop
“You know, since your hair is in that awkward grow-out phase!”
Dyson DC34 Handheld Vaccuum
$160 via Best Buy
For those who have an unfortunate pet-hair situation.
Chanel Correcteur Perfection Long Lasting Concealer
$40 via Neiman Marcus
This is a genuinely great concealer (and the one I use every day), but buying it for another person as an unsolicited gift is only advisable if you know exactly what you’re doing.
Tanda Pearl Ionic Teeth-Whitening System
$195 via Neiman Marcus
There’s no two ways about it – buying someone at-home teeth whitening is probably the perfect combination of generous and mean.
Linea Pelle Jamie Waist Belt
$187 via ShopBop
“You only need a little help in the waist area and you’d have such a nice shape!”
Silk’n Flash&Go Laser Hair Removal Kit
$299 via Sephora
Wait, I take back what I said earlier – at-home laser hair removal is actually both the meanest and most generous unsolicited gift to give someone. “I thought maybe you’d want to get rid of that 5 o’clock shadow, lady!”