Normally when we profile a celebrity's handbag collection, we choose a celeb whose bags we'd love to have, or at least a celeb who has chosen things that we understand. When it comes to Heidi Klum, that's not exactly the case. In fact, I understand very little of what's going on below. The more I looked at pictures of Klum in outfits that she chose for herself, the less I understood why she's allowed to critique the taste of others on Project Runway.
Klum's style isn't anything I'd choose for myself, but there are some good handbags tucked in here and there, plus several handbags that are worth squinting at for a few moments while you ponder how exactly they came to exist in the first place. Below, you'll find the whole set. Proceed with caution.
Let's start at the bottom, for the only direction to go is up. This, for example, is a bag that Heidi's been carrying everywhere lately. I have no idea what it is, other than a mess.
This bag is also a mystery, but if you told me it was pleather, I'd believe you.
I don't understand anything about what's going on here.
On to the things that I don't understand but can identify! Heidi's quasi-boho style (when she's wearing something casual, at least) means she's a perfect Simone Camille customer. Here she is with a Simone Camille Large Carpet Bag. Shop Simone Camille via Luisa Via Roma.
Heidi's also a fan of the SC bags with which you might be slightly more familiar, like this Simone Camille Original Bag. Shop Simone Camille via Luisa Via Roma.
And another Simone Camille Original Bag - all are one-of-a-kind! Shop Simone Camille via Luisa Via Roma.
Even Heidi's Chanel choices are a bit strange - check out this Chanel Lambskin Tote with Exterior Pocket.
Heidi even wears her Hermes Birkin flap in a way that most people avoid.
Back to Chanel for a moment, though - this Chanel Logo Flap Bag is pretty nice.
I think that it's on of Klum's handlers carrying this Chanel Grand Shopping Tote, but it's in the same frame with Heidi, so let's go with it.
There are a lot of textures of black going on here, including a camouflage-embroidered Valentino Rockstud Trapeze Tote. Buy the plain version via Net-a-Porter for $2,395.
I am not at all mad at this green Givenchy Nightingale Bag. Buy through Barneys for $1,965.
Perhaps unsurprisingly (he is her Project Runway coworker, after all), Heidi carries quite a bit of Michael Kors and has for some time now. Here she is with a MICHAEL Michael Kors Astor Satchel, an old favorite from the brand. Shop MICHAEL Michael Kors via the brand's official site.
They're such good pals that MK even named a bag after her - the Michael Kors Heidi Satchel. Shop Michael Kors via the brand's official site.
A Kors bag doesn't have to be named after Heidi to grace her arm, though - she also loves her Michael Kors Miranda Tote. Buy through Michael Kors for $1,195.
And here's another Kors bag, this time the Michael Kors Gia Satchel. Get the natural snakeskin version on sale via Michael Kors for $1,538.
And another exotic Kors - the Michael Kors Silverton Bag. Shop Michael Kors via the brand's official site.
And finally, Heidi's Michael Kors Rehearsal Drawstring Satchel. Shop Michael Kors via the brand's official site.
Heidi wears a lot of neutrals in her casual time, but every now and then she pulls out a bright neon bag, like this Vince Camuto Coco Tote. Get the snakeskin-print version for $89 via Dillard's.
Speaking of neon contemporary bags, check out Heidi's Marc by Marc Jacobs Bob's Memphis Two-Tone Leather Tote. Shop Marc by Marc Jacobs via ShopBop.
I may not understand most of Heidi's personal style choices, but I do appreciate the fact that she carries indie designers pretty regularly. She loves her Krocoa Curvy Tote. Pick up a brown version on sale for $1,260 via Keath & Co.
Heidi's also a fairly ardent Newbark fan - I like this Newbark Lauren Crossbody Bag a lot.
This is a Newbark Shoulder Bag, although I couldn't find its proper name.
I actually quite like Heidi's Louis Vuitton African Queen Masai Limelight Clutch. Shop Louis Vuitton via the brand's official website.
Like many celebs, Heidi travels with a Louis Vuitton Pegase Suitcase. Pick one up via Louis Vuitton.
Curious about what was sitting on top of that LV suitcase? It was this Versace Signature Tote. Buy through Forward for $2,395.
Beyond Heidi's well-known love for Kors, she seems to also have a thing for Jimmy Choo. The proportion of this Jimmy Choo Rosabel Bag is...strange. Shop Jimmy Choo via Net-a-Porter.
This small Jimmy Choo Bonbon Crossbody Bag makes a little more visual sense. Shop Jimmy Choo via Net-a-Porter.
Heidi also has the Jimmy Choo Large Biker Bag, which is a similar look in a different size. Buy through Net-a-Porter for $1,795.
And finally, a Timmy Woods Lips Clutch, just for good measure. Buy through Patricia Field for $300.